[Wiley]

Gettin Filthy with God
Posted on May 4, 2013 by Wiley

Just in case you guys were worried I have had it too easy living the good life, have no fear….I am currently broke down in a desert and havent made any progress in 3 days. Turns out God is real, and that bastard doesn't have a very good sense of humor.

I kept delaying my departure from the beach as some decent waves showed up, then I wanted to stick around and see what Semana Santa was like at the beach as I was in Mexico City for the last one and missed the craziness. Things got pretty hectic, but from what I have heard I think Mexico takes the Easter holiday party title. It was still a good time, but I was sick of being the ****** by day 2 of this week long holiday. There were things I wanted to do to the van before taking off, but anytime I started into a project I drew a crowd, and the next thing I knew I would have to put it off for later. Then a motorcycle club of 50 or so showed up from Cucuta, and wouldnt leave me alone, or give me any space. They were great, they just wanted way too much of my time, and I was in the mood for some relaxing. Plus a few of their chicks really liked me, which worried me as I couldnt tell who was with who, and I figured I didnt want to mess with Colombian bikers from the Venezuela border, as they were probably like Hells Angels on meth. A bunch of other people constantly invited me to their fires, and wanted to hang out, at least 8 one of the nights, 8 fires, what the hell do I look like. Luckily it started to sprinkle that night so I hid in the van. Each day the girls who worked at the camp were now going to Tayrona in the evening to recruit people to come camp, and unknown to me were using me as one of the selling points, "you speak English, we have an American at camp". Several times I met someone randomly who would say, "oh you must be the Californian whos been living here, I heard about you". And anytime anyone who spoke English showed up it was, "I want you to meet so and so, they speak english". I started to feel like an ambassador, and not in a good way. Finally I had it and began blowing everyone off, turning into a hermit. It was surfing and sleeping….leave me alone dammit. It wasnt that bad, and as I have previously mentioned sometimes you feel like a rockstar being from the US, but that is only good for so long, then you just want to be invisible and do your own thing and relax. Luckily the place emptied out eventually and went from too much excitement to waaaay to boring. Ok, a few more days of surf and I am moving on.

After spending way too much time here I finally got the hell out of there, realizing I was way behind schedule once again it was time to rethink my plan. I wanted to check out the Guajira desert, an apparently beautiful place located in Northern Colombia bordering Venezuela. I also had friends to meet up with in Bogota, Pereira, Medellin, and Cali, but with the clock ticking I decided due to the difficulties of cities and having the van, I would stick to the colonial villages. That would lead me 1st to Barichara, reputedly one of Colombias most beautiful towns. The only problem, its a looooong way from the Coast, so its best to break up the journey. The problem with driving in Colombia, especially from the North to Central Colombia is there is not much in between, at least if your headed to the Santender region. There is pretty much only one two lane roads going to wherever you want all throughout Colombia, the options are limited. On top of the long distance, you have to deal with slow moving trucks constantly. The mountains and enormous and steep, full of curves, and everyone wants to pass, all the time. Knowing this I headed out at 5 am, and eventually found myself outside Bucaramanga my planned stop for the night. The problem with this, it was only 3 or 4 in the afternoon and I figured I could keep pushing. I kept going, but as the sun went down the traffic got worse, and while I made it fine, it was a long day of driving, but I finally arrived in San Gil.

San Gil, Colombia
Ahhh, cool mountain air! Located in the mountains, San Gil has become a tourist destination for extreme sports. There is white water rafting, paragliding, waterfall repelling, you name it. Thats all fine, but none of it really excites me, so I was just there to sleep for the night. It seemed like a cool place though and I could have spent more time there. I did the quick tour around the main square and hit the sack, exhausted. The next day I headed to the nearby Barichara.

Barichara, Colombia
Barichara is a pleasant enough place. Its beautiful, and would be a great place to take your girlfriend. There wasnt much going on, at all, so after two hours of checking out the place I took off to some other small spots and eventually Villa De Leyva. Another peaceful, attractive town, Villa De Leyva is full of white washed buildings, cobblestone streets, and famous for having the largest square in Colombia. The square is huge, and as you can see, empty. I think a bench or two would really pull this thing together. There is a small birdbath, I mean fountain. Turns out the fountain actually provided water to the locals, maybe it still does I dont know, but for such a big square it seems like a huge waste to me. Not at tree, nowhere to sit, nothing, just a rather unpleasant long walk along the cobblestone streets. I arrived late at night and found a spot to sleep right off the square. This was yet another town where I would go to sleep blending in with a street full of other cars, only to wake up around 3 or 4 and see I was the only one on the deserted street. Not a problem, but its always such a weird feeling, and sometimes you wonder why the locals aren't parked in the street, what are they afraid of…what shouldI be afraid of??. Villa De Leyva had a safe feel the whole time, but sometimes you just never know. The main thing to do there is walk the streets, so thats what I did. I also hiked up the hill to the mirador, and man after a few months at sea level I was much more winded than I thought I would be. It was a great view, and pretty cold on top, which I loved. And look, I can see my house from here.

Zipaquira, Colombia
Another stop was at Zipaquira, and this is probably where things went bad. Famous for an underground Salt Cathedral…wait what? Yup, its a salt mine, and the workers had carved in a church, and religious sculptures. They then eventually made it slightly psychedelic to attract tourists. Its a cool place, and both the salt mines and the cathedral are in use. I took the included tour, where they walk you past the sculptures to the large cathedral and a few other things. I took the obligatory pictures, and then they let you loose to wander back to the entrance at your own pace for better pics. Yeah, they left me alone, you dont leave this kid unsupervised underground! After stopping to try and get some better shots as its pretty dark down there, I took my obligatory, patented tongue out shot, and then realized I was all alone. So I took this pic with the cross, no big deal, hey its what god wanted right…little did I know what he had in store for me, but that would wait. I left the mine and wandered around the town, eventually calling it a night. When getting out of the van in the mornings I always try and get out nonchalantly. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't, that day it didnt. A woman setting up her coffee stand right by the van smiled at me and asked if I slept there. I chatted her up a bit and she was the typical Colombian you hear about, super happy and enjoying life. I headed off but made sure when I returned to talk to her more as well as buy some snacks from her as she had left me in a good mood just from the short conversation. Now keep in mind this was a middle aged woman, not the "every Colombiana is beautiful" type of female, I just really enjoyed her energy. As I drove off I couldnt help leaving Zipaquira feeling great, her personality was amazing, I love when I bump into people like that, we need more like her in this world.

Tatacoa Desert, Colombia
After reading several other bloggers positive reviews of the Tatacoa Desert I headed off in that direction. Tatacoa is known due to its lack of light pollution, clouds, and star gazing. The proximity to the ecuator means you can view both the northern and southern hemisphere constellations, virtually year round. That sounds great to me, some free camping, relaxing, and space. I love space, I have read a couple books on string theory that hurt my brain, but I cant get enough, that stuff is crazy. Well when I arrived there were tons of clouds, and everything was green…is this the desert I read about? One positive to this is it is unusually cooler…though still damn hot, and the combination of blue skies, clouds, and mountains makes this place beautiful, which seems to be a common theme in this country. I headed off down the dirt road into the desert ready for a few days of relaxing and nights of star gazing. I arrived at a fork in the road and wasnt sure which one was the main road. I picked one and kept moving. About an hour into the drive I got to a small pueblo of 5 or so houses. I talked with a woman who told me this was the end of the desert, and that I couldnt continue due to the river. Damn, that means I should have went the other way as others have driven a few hours in, no big deal, ill just head back.

As I am nearing the fork again this is where God bitch slapped me. I start to hear a metal on metal grinding. Oh shit, this isnt the first time I have heard this. I had tried to get it checked out a few months before in Colombia, but the guys were trying to play games with me thinking I was a stupid ******, so I told them to forget it and left, thinking I would fix it later. Then it went away, and being parked for so long it completely slipped my mind. I decided I didnt want to take the wheel apart as it was high noon, and I was worried once I took it off I might not get it back on, pretty dangerous in a desert. Everything worked as expected, and as I stated it wasnt the first time I had heard it. Suddenly as I am going down a decent sized hill I find I have no brakes, oh wtf. I remain fairly calm and kick the emergency brake in the Astro…nothing happens. Luckily the hill wasnt very big for Colombian hill standards, and I eventually come to a stop. I take a look and see brake fluid leaking from the rear drivers side caliper. Luckily due to others misfortunes I know I can clamp off the hose and regain my three brakes to at least drive somewhere to get it taken care of. I pull out some tools but it is crazy hot under this sun, and having had two rounds of surgery on my back for melanoma in the past, I decide I am not doing it here. I am close to the entrance of the desert so rather than do it out in the open I throw it in 1st gear and crawl along hoping to make it to the village. 1st keeps me from going too fast, though there are a few small hills where its pushing it a bit since the dirt road is a bit rough. Everything is going fine until I see the church in the distance, and the giant *** hill that I need to go down to get to it…son of a bitch, that mother f'er is messing with me. Knowing there is no way in hell I can get down there with no brakes I pull under a tree and break out the tools. Sweet freedom is so close, just taunting me. Its F'ing hot, I am a sweaty mess, and I havent even started doing anything yet. Naturally the lugs are on too tight, so I arm myself with PB Blaster and battle it out for about 2 hours in the heat. Im finally down to the last lug but this one isnt giving and just rounds the corners so I cant get it off. I grab my sledge and reluctantly sacrifice a good craftsman socket as I have no choice, bashing it over the lug so it will hold and finally getting it off. The bad news, I find out my Caliper and rotor have pretty much exploded. I crimp off the brake hose and give it a test assuming I can finally get out of there….nope. Ah wtf, im low on brake fluid, and walk 20 minutes into town looking for a store or the mechanic. I find a hardware store and see some fluids, what luck. I talk to some people and ask if they sell the fluid as my car has no brakes…do you have a moto? No I just said car…it turns out no one here sells brake fluid, and there is only a motorcycle mechanic in town. Figures, guess this will have to wait until tomorrow. Turns out the desert is hot in the evening too, it didnt get cool until at least 11, and cool is stretching it…lets say it was an uncomfortable night…though I probably lost a few pounds of sweat so thats something going for me. The plan is to get the fluid in so I have 3 brakes and limp my way to Ecuador and fix everything there as it will be much cheaper. Apparently Colombia has a 50% import tax on auto parts, not really something I want to be paying right now. I jump online to try and figure out what I need to do, and other recommend the exact same plan, get to ecuador…sweet I am not a complete idiot after all. I take the collectivo into neiva and head for the centro. As I get to the city I see it. Hold up, a chevy dealership…stop, let me off here please! What luck, these guys will have fluid, and I can find out if I can get parts or not since its a North American vehicle, I am not optimistic but at least its a chevy dealer.

Its still early, so I head to the exito across the street 1st to grab some food and see if they sell the fluid cheaper. They dont, so I eat my food and grab a box for the leftovers. I head to the Chevy dealer…but am denied at the door. I am intercepted by the doorman wearing a crisp pair of blue jeans, white long sleeve shirt, and a cowboy hat, asking what I need. I ask him if they sell brake fluid, but he cant get past the ****** with the box of food as he keeps looking at it with confusion on his face, clearly not listening. "Do you know where I can buy it"? No. Ok, pissed off I just smile and laugh not wanting to deal with this guy, say thanks and walk away, it was clear he didnt want to help me cause I was a ******. After 15 feet I decide I am not giving up that easy and go back, its a freaking chevy dealer, my chevy was bitch slapped. I show him a pic of my exploded metal collection, and tell him its a Chevy…can I just talk to someone about it. He hesitates, says ok, and escorts me in, and hangs out, listening to the dilemma. He eventually warms up to me, and in hindsight I think he blew me off cause I was using the word fluido, and here they use liquido. Its minor, but I think he assumed I couldnt speak any spanish, and once he heard me talking to the woman, albeit broken spanish, he started being more helpful. Its crazy, I have said dinero for money and gotten strange looks since they use plata here…give me a break I know you know the word, people who only speak french know what dinero means. Eventually I am surrounded by 7 mechanics, cause thats what happens when a ****** whos crazy enough to drive from the US needs help. Well, I didnt get much help but I did get a lot of attention. I had to show them all pics of the van, cause they dont know what an Astro is….even though I am trying to purchase DOT III fluid, so the vehicle doesnt matter at this stage. I also have to tell me story over and over 7 times as each new mechanic shows up. They dont sell it, but while I am there I try and get some Dextron III trans fluid as well as I am a little low, and have only found VI in Colombia. They only have VI, but eventually show me some generic Dextron and think it will work. Ok ill buy a little, better than nothing, especially since the guys at a different dealership tried to sell me VI,which cant be mixed with III. The chevy cowboy talks to the mechanics, and the next thing I know not only do I have a 6 dollar quart of the stuff, but they threw in another for free. Ahh, guilt is getting to you now cowboy, I will take it! The cowboy goes back to the door and the mechanics tell me I can find the DOT III in the centro so away I go. Then the cowboy is whistling me back, telling me the bus to the village where my van is is the other way. I tell him I need to go to the centro first, but appreciated his help one again. This guy is too nice now. I get to the centro and find the fluid no problem, grab a cab back to the Chevy/Exito to get the bus and he tells me to wait in the shade, he will let me know when the bus gets here. Suddenly he brings me a giant liter of cold soda for free…still feeling guilty huh cowboy. I dont even like soda but take it since he is being nice now. Its clearly his lunchtime but he hangs out for an hour waiting for the bus…though it never comes. He finally tells me I could try the terminal, so I head there and get the bus back to the village. I am glad I won him over but pissed I almost let him blow me off. Either way I am thankful I just laughed and said thanks originally, as I was pissed at his blow off attempt and barely bit my tongue.

I add the fluid and expect to bleed the brakes and roll to sweet freedom. Start the van and the pedal goes straight to the floor, God dammit. I jump online and eventually figure out that when the brakes failed and originally went to the floor while I was careening down one of the butt puckering hills with no brakes that I may have tore the Master Cylinder seal….the what? God Dammit. Now its been three days and I am no farther from that tree I parked under. To top it off I only have 17 days left on the visa I already extended, which I am pretty sure will be impossible to make it out of the country by then. I do know I can get a mechanic to write a letter and they will let me stay, though I would like to just get out of here now, I have had enough. Luckily its not a terrible place to be aside from the heat, and everyone seems very friendly, so it could be worse. I have had a few visitors stop to offer help or check on me, and I am not worried about leaving the van and getting robbed. Then a group of bicyclists stops by to offer help. Only this guy doesnt help anything, he just tells me I need god in my life….then I remember getting filthy with the cross…..God dammit, the big guy is still messing with me.
Turns out the bastard does have a sense of humor. Rather than having this happen in the cool mountain air he waited till I got to the hot *** empty desert to bitch slap my ***, as well as not delivering anymore Israeli girls in the meantime. I probably cant get the part I need without importing it, though am headed back to the city tomorrow to see what can be done. While I knew this was a risk when taking the Astro, I was really hoping it would happen in a country other than Colombia due to that importation tax, and somewhere other than a hot *** desert near the equator, in May! While I may not be very religious I told my friends I am converting to Muslim just to spite the old bastard. So much for the good life….I may be here for a looong time.

 

[Wiley]

F This Sh!t, Im Going Home
Posted on May 12, 2013 by Wiley

To hell with those other guys, praise Sir Issac Newton, gravity is great! After what felt like 40 days in the desert, I was finally able to get the wheel off the van, find some brake fluid, clamp off the bad caliper, and gravity bleed the brakes, yes that little bit took 5 days. Everything is slow down here, and there was lots of running around, not to mention I couldnt get the other wheels off to even check the other brakes for their condition even though I used 1.5 cans of PB Blaster on them and had a breaker bar. A special thanks to the guy who rotated my tires for me really getting those lugs on good and tight…I really appreciate it! Once it was finally time to go, I tested everything on the smaller hills I had already come down, and it was garbage, but I couldnt stay up on that hill any longer, I was near my limit. I hoped there would be no cows in the road today as every other day they would inevitably be there blocking the motos from coming up the hill, but lucked out…..today was just a different broken down car midway down the hill, blocking my lane. Luckily no one was coming in the oncoming lane and I made it down, followed by slowly limping my way to Neiva, a reasonably sized city an hour away if I had working brakes, so obviously it took me a bit longer. On a related note I had emailed the Chevy US site requesting part numbers for rotors, calipers, and a master cylinder, mentioning that I was trapped in a desert in Colombia. As I had already talked to the Neiva Chevy I knew finding the parts would be difficult as they had no idea what to do with an Astro. I have yet to hear back from Chevy US. F-Chevy
I made it to Neiva but by then it was night and the chevy dealer was closed so continued on looking for somewhere safe looking to sleep, when my brakes went again. As luck would have it I ended up at a 24 hr tire mechanics shop, better than nothing….or so I thought. Since I couldnt get the other wheels off I had him tackle the other lug nuts, and figured since it was so damn hot and I was desperate with time running out on my visa I would pay him to put on the spare set of brake pads I had so I could limp my way to Ecuador for repairs. He ended up causing more harm than good, and when I wasnt looking let my Master Cylinder bleed dry. What the hell, your just supposed to be putting the new pads on, why would you even take the calipers off?? Great, he just undid everything I had done in the desert. Much time was spent tracking down new rotors, as mine were shot. After running around Neiva we found a guy who knew of a shop in Bogota that sold only American parts, I had asked to get the address but forgot when all was said and done, I figured it would be a great resource for others in case of trouble…sorry guys. The old pads only had 15K on them, not that many miles for a set of pads, even with a loaded van. These things were in terrible shape, and had took the rotors with them. Since I had to remove the calipers to put on the rotors, and since my good buddy had already let a bunch of air into the system, I decided to take the calipers apart and clean them while I was at it. These things were also in terrible shape, and what I suspect was the route of the problem. With a lot of effort I managed to get all but one of the pins free, and regreased them. I also took out the pistons to give them a cleaning, they were usable but also not great, so gonna need four calipers when I get a chance as well. Turns out sitting for 4 months by a salty sea is a recipe for disaster when it comes to move parts, especially important ones. Tough lesson learned, wont be making that mistake again.

I also wasted a bunch of time running around between the DIAN trying to get an extension on my vehicle importation. They couldnt help me, it was too small a city, but they did call to Bogota and told me I needed to go there with a certificate from Chevy. Cool no problem, I only have 2 weeks left. Oh by the way, you need to do it by the 15th, not the 19th….ah hell, now I have even less time than I thought. Driving down to Tatacoa I already had 2 cops who couldnt read my extension and while one was on the phone checking my visa date, the other threatened to put me in handcuffs. I laughed as I knew I had a month left, and am pretty sure they cant do that, and I only pay a penalty, but either way I would rather avoid finding out. There not all bad though, last night I was awoken at 11:30 in the night by the cops. They didnt care that I was sleeping in the van, just that I was sleeping in the van in a dangerous section of town. They told me to follow them and off we went to where the set me up in a safer section, where I had a problem free night.
So after the DIAN tells me they cant help me in Neiva, I go to Chevy but they wont give me a certificate, something about legal stuff, since the van isnt there for them to see. Yeah I know that, thats the whole problem…if I could drive it I would swing by so you could look and give me the Cert, but that would be pretty dangerous with no brakes. Come on, where did the Chevy Cowboy go, I am sure he has my back. I then asked if they could at least give me a written note in Spanish to explain why the wouldnt help me so I could take that to the DIAN, they said sure, come back tomorrow. I went back the next day, this time bringing the mechanic and one of the shot rotors. That did nothing for me, and they told me to come back the next day for the letter. Day 3 they were busy but told me to come by later, so I left them my Colombian number and asked them to text me as I was sick of this game…I am still waiting for that text. Fool me 3 times…..nevermind. I finally stopped going back as they clearly had no intention of helping me. F-Chevy.
To go off on another side rant, while I like my van, I have grown to hate Chevy. You have to be a god damned mechanic to own one of these pieces of crap. I am constantly playing catchup, rather than preventative maintenance on this van. Add the terrible customer service I have received and I will now be boycotting Chevy and all affiliates, and recommend you do as well. Heres a quick review of my problems off the top of my head, I know there are others. Per recommendation I changed the coolant fluid from Dexcool to the green stuff, as the Dexcool has ended up a bad decision by Chevy and causes rust in the systems. Due to a known and ignored issue I slid through a stop sign in Panama City, luckily avoiding hitting anyone, so removed the ABS fuse which means I dont have ABS brakes. Many people have had this problem, yet Chevy never did a recall or extended their warranty or anything, they simply ignored this issue that clearly puts lives at risk. I have doors that wouldnt open, as well as a rear hatch that wont shut (I cable lock it though its obvious it wont shut, yeah that wont attack thieves). My rear view mirror fell of, though that was probably due to all the Jesus bling. My AC stopped working due to cheap vaccum hoses….I am sure there is more.
On top of the chevy related problems I have more, naturally a year on the road will take its toll on your stuff. Of the two batteries my auxillary battery is dead, which means no fridge, lights, computer or camera charging, and the fantastic fan, while providing a breeze from the opening, does not have a working fan….so its not so fantastic. The other battery looses its charge quickly though I can go about 5 days before it goes dead on me. My power inverter is also dead, so if the battery did work I still wouldnt have that power. Any zipper I have, computer bag, awning cover, etc is stuck shut from the salt. My awning screened room zipper stopped closing so its worthless against the bugs. hmm, I know there is more.
When things go bad you are forced to look at the bright side, otherwise your just gonna bring yourself down. Neiva doesnt have much going on, and I had no intention of stopping there. There are little if any tourists as everyone either goes to the Tatacoa desert, or the nearby San Augustine ruins. Even if I had stopped there it wouldnt have been the same experience. I never would have met the people I did by being broken down at the shop. Every day all throughout the day and into the night the same group of 20 or so guys would stop by and see how things were going for the ******, and provide their expertise on what I should do, all different opinions of course. At times it was annoying, I was constantly interrupted from working on the van, and explaining the same things over and over to them. If I chose to go back to work they simply stayed and watched looking over my shoulder. When I had decided I needed to do it myself so I knew things were done properly I still had the mechanic, his 16 year old son, and his 7 year old daughter sitting there watch me. The day I bled my brakes the mechanic was literally in the wheel well, in my way, watching the air bubbles come out of the bleeder valve. How on earth could that possibly be interesting? Several times I had 4-5 people at once trying to work on my van. I am sure it was clear I was loosing patience, and several times told everyone to just stop, that I was doing it myself. But in the end they were great people, who showed genuine concern for me. As no one spoke any English it was also great for my Spanish. I got to know them and their city, and while its hot as hell and I would rather not go back for that reason, I will be making a point to return there everytime I am in Colombia to stop by and say hello. The mechanic had constantly invited me back to his home though I declined, sleeping in the van at the shop. Once I was finally up and running I finally took him up on his offer and followed him to the barrios. His family was amazing and we had one of those nights you read about on these blogs. I figure I now consider them my Colombian family, so not all was wasted on this misfortune.

After about 5 days of living at the 24 mechanics shop and running all over Neiva, I finally got out of there too, but at this point I had had it. I had already been contemplating what I should do, and had posted up some questions to the guys on Expo the previous month about options to leave the van in South America and return home for a bit of…….work. Ugh I feel nauseous. I have mentioned previously that some issues with the IRS left me with 1/3 less of my planned budget for this trip. Turns out that probably isnt fully resolved, as this years tax return has been under review for 3 months now and they wont give it to me. After 4 calls to the IRS its clear I cant do anything about it from Colombia as no one will tell me anything other than keep checkin in, even though I told them if I am getting notices sent home I wouldnt see them, which means more fines racking up to look forward to. Now that I had been on the road longer than planned I had been counting on the return towards the original budget as well, so now I am at only having 50% my planned budget for the trip. Add the fact that my 1st post about the trip on Expo had me naively estimate 6 months to Argentina with the possibility of a 12 month round trip, and once again I have another recipe for disaster. I think I am about month 14 into the trip at this time, so either I haul *** down to the end just to say I did it, or I go back and try to regroup, returning to South America a bit later, to do it right. The repair costs didnt help, so the decision has been made. I am headed north to look for work, as well as address the issues with the van and my stuff mentioned above….not to mention I am way overdue for a haircut. Its not as bad as the title to this post sounds I just like being dramatic. I had a great trip over the past 14 months and dont regret a single thing. I met amazing people and saw amazing things. The blog will be going quite for awhile, but once the tires hit SA dirt again you'll be hearing for me.

 

[Wiley]

Bonus! Mini Moto trips
At this point the van sat until 2018, but that wasn't the end of my travels
A Tale of Highs and Low(sides): My 3 Week Motorcycle Adventure in Northern Thailand
Posted on December 15, 2015 by Wiley

Thailand
Ok, so this isn't overland in a van, but it is overland travel I just ditched two of the wheels, but for some reason I still get traffic on this website so may as well keep spreading the travel bug. I turned off the notifications since it's not the van, but if you're lucky enough to have found this page get ready for more of my awesomeness, and check out my 3 week motorcycle adventure in northern Thailand.

Yup, it's been a long time since my last "vacation", so booked a flight to Thailand with no plans other than renting a motorcycle and taking off on what many would argue to be some of the best ridding in the world. Was still trying to figure out if I should see Bangkok 1st or head straight to Chiang Mai when the Universe decided for me, as I broke a toe walking out of the bathroom the day before leaving. Ok, walking sucks anyway, Chiang Mai it is.

After hours and hours of flying I found myself in the future, where is that sports almanac anyway? Since it was about 1:30am local time by the time I cleared customs I tried unsuccessfully to sleep a few hours in the airport and then booked a ticket to Chiang Mai that would leave at 8am in the morning. Arriving in Chiang Mai I got in a taxi at the airport which had pre-determined prices so at least you know you are not getting too ripped off. I think it was 5 USD, though with the "red cars" which are the red pickup truck/taxis I only paid 1.50 USD going back to the airport, and it was empty/just me, so technically you are getting ripped off. From the airport, I went straight to the motorcycle shops which line the city wall, I was ready to ride. Traded some cash and my passport (gulp) for a Honda CRF 250 (gag) from the 2nd shop as the 1st didn't have any available for two weeks. Prices are set, demand is high so you probably can't negotiate too much, two weeks was 650 bhat a day I think, which was 18USD a day for the 250. Saw lots of scooters for rent everywhere, and the bigger bikes are gaining popularity at certain shops as well, so you don't need to do anything ahead of time. That said I talked to a girl who was stuck with a 125 cause she couldn't find a 250 so the demand is probably high, probably tough to find from so many idiots crashing them. Anyway, I was never even asked if I knew how to ride let alone have a license, though the fact that I brought my own gear was probably a dead give away. I did get an international driving permit before hand which I recommend having on hand just in case though I have zero faith they will ever be useful when need, but I was never asked for anything the whole trip. Occasionally I was turned back at borders, though even then I was out there, and am still not sure if it was the Myanmar border, or entrance to the opium fields, but documentation was never an issue/questioned.

Chiang Mai , Thailand
Chiang Mai is Thailands second largest city, and is therefore a bit chaotic. Not bad but I wouldn't want to jump into riding with little experience here, though as you often read on these sites many do just that judging from the bandaged travelers everywhere. Naturally everyone assumes I fall into that catalog limping around with the toe taped up. Wrong bitches my moto skills are too good, it's the walking that gets me. I'm so under prepared for this trip, the places I saved on google maps were unavailable on my iPhone since I didn't know my password so I have no list of sites I want to see. On top of that I was in a rush so didn't get any maps in Chiang Mai even though I know the GT-Rider maps are great. I Also read you may now need to register your phone for a SIM card, all crap I dont want to deal with….so no internet either, nothing. Just started heading for the mountains looking for the famous Mai Hong Son loop. Who knows how to get there, or what I'm missing, I just want out of this city as I can see the mountains calling me. Naturally I started wrong and found myself on Rt 1004 but with no destination didn't care. Found a few dead ends, a wat (Buddhist temple) or two, and then back to Chiang Mai looking for the 107 and eventually the 1095 to Pai, a town any northern Thai backpacker knows well….sigh.

The road to Pai, which sounds delicious, will be nice in a few months but is under construction now, a lot of wet clay and loose dirt. Its a great place to explore, organize treks, etc. just not what I want in the next three weeks since I can get away, and the clock's ticking. I stopped for the night outside Pai as I got a late start with my "detours", probably better I didn't stay there as the town is full of burnt out farangs (foreigners) anyway. The next morning I continued on towards Mai Hong Son, a town within a province of the same name, part of a 600 km journey with approximately 1,864 curves, all back to back with switchback after switchback through the most mountainous province in all of Thailand. Yeah that is not a typo, nor an exaggeration, 1,864. I spent the 1st half if the day in pouring rain, not exactly my preference on this technical mountain road, but the views are amazing, and the road is in great shape after the clay roads in Pai. A few hours later and things turned around, I had beautiful blue skies, so I decided to go even faster to air dry myself, which worked as well as I had deduced. As soon as I dried off the skies turned black and it was back to being cold and miserable, with some added lightening this time. Hmm, I will keep going, I think it's safe to ride in lightning but have no idea, but its a long way back, I am not really sure where I am, or how far back MHS is. My plan was to take the side road I had read about to Mai aw which had no sign, 16 km outside MHS. What the lonely planet article didn't say was 16 km NORTH of MHS, so I missed that one. Idiots, if you describe a loop going north to south and say 16km AFTER MHS everyone is going to assume the southern end, fix your damn site. I know I set the bar high here on 2guys1truck but come on.

So, they were not lying about that road, switch backs and sharp curve one after another for hours. It was fun, but personally too technical in the rain as the turns are sharp, and between driving on the left side plus the oncoming cars driving in my left lane as well meant I couldn't take lines I normally would, as if I am an expert rider or something. Its also very tough to take pictures with no shoulders and thick forest/jungle, but it was still an awesome ride. Plus if I stop all those slow bitches I passed will catch back up to me, and we cant have that, so pic taking was at a minimum. After hours of this I'm cold and wet unsure where I will sleep. I'm not seeing hotels or hostels where I am, but there's a lot going on with the riding plus I can't read Thai, so push on, it was a decent sized town/village, I probably could have stopped in hindsight, but up the mountain I go. Rain starts up again so I slow a bit, but this road has started to open up slightly with rolling curves rather than the hairpins I tackled all day. Much more enjoyable, but I still need to be cautious as I have off road tires rather than street tires so am sacrificing performance. I've been at it for hours, plus still adjusting after all the flying so mental fatigue is setting in, so you know, don't be bitch, just take it easy.

I go by a truck of local tribesmen working construction and give them a nod as I pass by. 3 switchbacks later (ok the fun wasn't completely over) and I come up to one of the straightest sections all day. Suddenly all I hear is scalping metal, in a flash I low side and am sliding behind my bike as it and I cross the road into the oncoming lane, I told you bitches my moto skills were too good to… um never mind. I slide to a stop at the side of the street but unfortunately the bike doesn't. I didn't see where it went as I was busy in a controlled slide across the wet asphalt, as if I just stole second. I was lucky it was so slick I never rolled, I bet I looked like I had everything under control but I didn't. The only downside was I landed on the toe as I went down. Everything happened in slow motion, as I slide along I even thought to myself great that's the broken toe, so I wasn't flying but still, too fast.

Turns out the bike went careening into a ditch missing a concrete post by only inches which would have led to some serious carnage. At least it, and myself, didn't go into any cars, or off the side of a mountain, and I think it went in with the tires parallel to the ditch which helped, but I was busy looking for cars as I slid so am not entirely sure. I heard the tribesmen up the road yelling to each other, and 30 seconds later are pulling up just as I stand the bike up and give it a test start, engine cranks to life, good job Honda, it's no Yamaha but I'm impressed. They don't speak a word of English, but I kill the engine and they help me lift it out so I can check the damage. One guy picks up a rectangular mirror from the ditch, I gesture that mine are round and we all laugh, looks like I'm not the only idiot who fell victim to this straightaway.

Somehow I escape with only a slight bruise to my hip if that, pink not even purple, all the gear all the time! The bike fared worse, with a bent shifter, bent signals up front, lost the low beam, the horn chirped when I let off the gas, the computer broke loose but functioned, and I lost both mirrors, but I did add some manly scars to the paneling while I was at it so I am sure pops will be proud. I was able to attach the mirror that didn't shatter later that night, nothing like flying blind after a wreck in the meantime. Luckily the rain stops 20 minutes later and I have amazing weather for the rest of the vacation, I continued on, cause well, what else are you gonna do in the middle of nowhere? Dammit, only mother f'ing day 2.

Get the F out of the way

Having now broken the bike in to my liking, I spent the next two weeks running all over northern Thailand, 2,700 miles of random sightseeing. I got lost all the time, but I figure I couldn't get lost since I had no destinations. I basically followed the Myanmar/Laos borders and explored areas that had squiggly lines on the phone map app. Once I started using that it helped, but A map would have solved my problems, as the roads are well numbered, 90% are in great shape, and the scenery is beautiful. The food is amazing and cheap, the plates/bowls you see cost 1 USD or less, at home I would pay 10USD for the equivalent. Rooms were usually less than 10USD, and there are gas stations every few hours at least, with the CRF I never had a problem if I filled it anytime I hit the medium tank mark. The people are nice, but the English is usually basic once you get out there, so it was tougher to immerse than previous trips I have taken, though that may have to do with a combo of being a solo bike rider on a 3 week vacation, so your racing that clock and can go fairly undetected…though my gear was a dead giveaway that I was a foreigner as most do not have much if anything for protection.

You can buy just about anything you need up there, there are 7/11s in any decent sized town, as well as a mall or two here or there. You will see wats every couple kilometers, like ruins in Latin America you will get wat-ted out, as they all look start to look the same, and I have no idea if I am looking at one that is 500 years old or 500 days. Chiang Mae is fairly touristy, but enough to see and a great start for many destinations in the north. Going straight to the north worked out great, and having the bike was the only way to see the country. I don't think I would have liked Thailand had I just took a vacation there. I didn't love it, but again just rushed it and only saw a small portion of it. I picture the South and Bangkok much more what I dislike, the north was great because no one cared you were there, no one tried to sell me crap, and prices were always the same no matter who I asked. This map shows roughly where I went, though I hit up additional areas that were not captured.

I did a bunch of touristy things, stayed in some hostels here, guest houses there. If your traveling is limited outside Chiang Mai Doi Suthep, and to a lesser extend Doi Inthanon, are very touristy and can be skipped if you have wheels, but the roads around them make it worth it so I squeezed them in, but you get better views without the tourists elsewhere. I hit the MHS as mentioned, and crossed back to Chiang Mai to reset. I then headed to the bottom on northern Thailand to visit some smaller and less visited ruins at Sukhothai, would have been worth it but I missed the good roads and ended up on the main highway, which was only kind of fun due to the fairly consistent chaos I would have to endure, but boring straight roads, decent and peaceful ruins, but saw it and left in an hour. Then followed the Myanmar border back north to hit Mae Aw, the ride is decent as described. Stopped to buy some tea and rest, another nice peaceful place less visited though slightly touristy. Then continued further north in Chiang Rai, also a decent city for a night or two, but a bit touristy. Good ridding around both Myanmar and Laos borders here. I ended up in Chiang Rai a night too long so the next day rather than head out towards the Nan province as the ridding is supposed to be great there, but my hangover said otherwise. Since I was supposed to return the bike the next day I decided to go back towards Chiang Mai and stop at Phayao lake instead since it was close. Well itt was hectic, not the peaceful lake I was looking for, so I just went all the way back the Chiang Mai, 2 weeks traveling around Thailand.

Yes that did say 3 week motorcycle adventure… but I originally reserved it for 2 knowing I could keep it longer if needed, and having ridden so much I decided to return the bike and see what the damage would be. I showed up and no one was around, great it was a zoo when I picked it up now no one is busy which means no one is distracted. Luckily, the guy checking the bike could care less and just poked and prods and clearly doesn't see anything, sweeeet, looking good. Then out of nowhere a mechanic runs over, bang bang bang, hits every spot that had damage I did. He knew what was old and what was mine….son of a bitch, well you got me, I am impressed. We discuss prices a bit and I throw out that I am posting the trip on the GT-Rider website so they know to be fair, which I IMG_2655think helped. I still overpaid, but I tried a few shops before hand for some of the misc parts while in other cities and couldn't get anything as simple as a brake lever from several honda dealerships without ordering the part. I finally spoke with an english guy working or owning a shop who hooked me up and said they didnt stock parts, he had just what I needed and charged me under 10 for the brake lever, shifter bent back, and the handlebars straightened with a good 2×4 bashing, for 10USD try that in America. So all in all pop motorcycle only changes me 200 USD not too bad considering they had my passport so things could have been worse, but I was at fault and it would have cost me more in the US. I kept the computer and scratched panel as souvenirs, to make sure they replace everything.

Thailand is fairly modern, and I like a challenge so I was probably getting bored or the ADD kicked in, so rather than get the bike for another week I decided to hop the border and booked a last minute trip to Angkor Wat, the world's largest religious site, some more ruins.

Cambodia
This was one that has been on the list, and will only be getting more full of farangs as each day passes. Everything I read says take a tuk-tuk, DO NOT ride a bike, but I like to do things the hard way. No Van or Motorcycle here, you already know I borrowed a bike from the hostel. While it is HOT here, it was not a terrible ride in November, though would not recommend at worse times of the year, or if your a wuss. This side trip was just fly in, see some sights, return to Bangkok to head back to the US, typical tourists stuff, yeah, I am one of those sometimes.

 

[Wiley]

And the Earth Shook: My 3 Week Motorcycle Adventure in Ecuador
Posted on October 7, 2016 by Wiley

Ecuador
So, after spending 2 years driving around Latin America while living out of my Van, I returned to the workforce to be reminded it sucks. I needed desperate relief, so last year I took a 3 week vacation to Thailand (A Tale of Highs and Low-Sides: My 3 Week Motorcycle Adventure in Northern Thailand), but I felt Thailand was just too easy. This year there is no wussing out, it's back to Latin America, Ecuador to be exact.

Quito, Ecuador
I arrived in Ecuador worn out. Stayed at work till 10:30 the night before leaving to make sure that everything was done, then I was up all night packing cause I am a procrastinator. Next thing I know I am on 3 hours sleep and jumping on a bus to make my way to the Tijuana border hauling a big *** luggage full of moto gear. Flying out of Mexico was cheaper and gave me an extra day in Ecuador schedule wise, but in hindsight I won't do it again, its just too easy to fly out of SD. Figured I would sleep on the plane and be set as it's an overnight flight from Mex City to Quito, but of course I can't sleep. I arrive in Quite at 6 am, can't check into the hostel until noon, so leave my bags and walk around for a few hours in a comatose, wondering why the F I cannot breath, and keep breaking into a sweat even though there is a nice crisp cool breeze in the air… might have something to do with going from sea level to 9,350 feet in altitude.

If you didn't know, Quito is the highest populated city in the world, sitting alongside a Volcano factory, which equates to some amazing riding. It is also the most unaltered of any UNESCO site, and while there is a KFC in centro historico, Quito still has a great old city feel to it overall. I decided to spend the 1st 2 days exploring the city and letting myself acclimate before picking up the bike. i didn't get any headaches or feel sick, but I did feel off, and had no appetite for 3 days or so, glad I made the decision as I enjoyed my time in Quito.

I stayed in between the Historic Center, and the more modern area, think its called plaza foch, this area and the surrounding streets are where you can find the touristy stuff. If your not sure if your in the vicinity of Plaza Foch, but see a couple McDonalds, a Burger King, a KFC, and other ****** joints, rest assured that's the place. Anyway, it was perfect as I was far enough from the modern area while still having access. I was able to walk all over the place and be back on the streets of Latin America where I think I belong, but in reality probably don't haha. Unfortunately Quito has a minor problem with theft and pick pocketing so you do need to use some caution when out and about, but most Ecuadorians read my blog so already knew not to mess with this ******, but the rest of you should keep this in the back of your mind.
The night before picking up the bike I decide I would go to bed early so was just relaxing in bed at the hostel when it started. I had been pretty sure I was the only one in the room, what the hell is the guy above my bunk doing jumping all around? A couple seconds go by and I realize, oh, it's an earthquake……oh, I am on the 5th floor of an old *** building built in the 1600's, and it's an earthquake. I just stay where I am and see what happens, I dont think running for the creaky stairs is the right play, but I am not sure what I should really do here, the floor literally springs as you walk without and earthquake taking place. I live in San Diego now, and have felt a few quakes over 4.0, but our buildings are new, and the quakes were never that close, so they have always been fun. Well, this was a 4.7, and only 7 miles away from the city, but I admit, it was still fun. As long as no one is getting hurt and nothing getting damaged I love them, The fact that everything can shake like that just amazes me. There have been a larger than normal amount of quakes here in Quito the past year I am told, so most residents went outside in fear of aftershocks, now in hindsight that would have been the right play. This guy just called it a night and went to bed, but what a great way to kick off the trip.
I rented from Freedom Bike Rental in Ecuador…contrary to my comments above this portion of this trip couldn't be easier. Stopped by the shop, grabbed the Suzuki DR200 I reserved, was given some tire irons, spare tires, air compressor, and a cell phone….hey, I wanted this to be difficult! Left the shop headed for Mindo, an easy ride, only to realize my GPS Ecuador map was still on my computer, not my GPS. There is the challenge I was looking for. Decided to wing it, had an afternoon ride out of Quito, looping around Quito, and deciding to go back to Quito…only problem Quito is F'ing Huge. All I know is I am now in South Quito, know idea what that means , but the city runs north to south so I just made my way north following the flow of traffic figuring I would get back to the centro, which I did eventually.
The next day I have my maps, and the weather is looking good, so it's off to Mindo, a sleepy town located on the western slopes of the mighty Andes mountains, and according to Wiki one of the most heavily tourist-ed places in Ecuador, with tubing canyoning, bird watching, hmm, no mention of motorcycles, this place can't be that great. The area here is known as a cloud forest, whatever that means, so it was no surprise I ended up riding in rain and fog high in the mountains. I arrive in the early afternoon wet and cold, but figure I might as well ride a little more so after doing a lap of the town on the bike scoping out some places to stay with parking, I head up a dirt road I see at the back of town to try and kill an hour or so….hmm, I knew they left the motorcycle part out accidentally. The road was nothing special, but being on dirt, surrounded by lush green mountains while getting rained on, yes this is why I am here.

After playtime on the dirt road I make my way back to Mindo, which again, is a sleepy town. Nothing I saw on a Monday night would indicate this is on the tourist map aside from the numerous hostels and several pizzarias in this small town. I only saw about 6 or 7 small groups of gingos if that. Thats ok though, its tranquil here, and I like that, plus it was cool but not cold, and I like that as well. I lay in my hammock watching the rain for an hour or so just listening to it and the birds Once it stops raining I am free and walk around the small town for hours, literally doing laps up and down the main street and the few side streets, crazy yes, I am not giving gringos a good name, but I was bored, and hoping something, somewhere in this small town would happen, eventually. Every restaurant was empty, aside from the occasional ****** couple in this pizzeria or that one, which were otherwise empty. I eventually gave in to the woman selling chicken and bananas on a stick on the street, the timeless classic chicken-bananabobs. I don't play favorites though, so also snagged some carne with mayonnaise, and some corn with cheese. That was the highlight of my evening, so eventually I went to bed. Its beautiful there though, and there is some great hiking and birdwatching, but I am here for the riding, so these are just stop overs for me.

The next day I make my way towards Otavalo, famous for it's Saturday market, of course it is Wednesday, but that is supposed to be the second best day to get a taste. Well, that little Suzuki 200 is sloooow, and I stop to take pictures, and I take dirt roads when i can, so we will see what the Thursday market looks like haha. I arrived in Otavalo around 6:30, grabbed a hostel and headed down to catch the end of the market, ti find the market closes at 7, just as I arrive. Oh well, the days ride was amazing, and exactly why I am here, you've seen 1 market you've seen them all, I am only here for the food anyway.

Half of my day might have been on dirt, the other portions on some great asphalt, some on decent asphalt with lots of dirt/rocks/boulders/sink holes, and even parts of the Inca trail I believe, literally a bit of everything. The views were great, and today I managed to stay dry, always a plus. I decided to stop by the Laguna Cuicocha for a photo on the way, a beautiful crater lake located just outside Otavalo. I arrived late in the afternoon and had no intention on hiking, but you can hike the rim in about 4 hours, so I have decided to stay an extra day to do the hike, before heading south to Banos the following day. Turns out this is a good decision for several reasons, as when I arrive at the hotel a couple guys in a car are pointing and saying something, but I cannot hear them. Not sure if they are trying to get my attention or the car behind me as they point behind me. I pull over to take a look, and when they pull up realize they are telling me my tire is low on air. No problem, at least I am here and not miles up in the middle of nowhere, I had to park in a parking area separate from the hotel, so rather than change it out myself I am going full ****** and paying the guy to do it tomorrow, just need to find, the guy. Now, there is a flat tire scam that goes on at time in parts of latin america, I don't think this was the case, the guys letting me know came from the 1 way road crossing the 1 way road I was on so there was no way they were involved, and I hadn't left my bike in awhile, I think it was just a fluke picking up a nail outside Otavalo.

So it took awhile to find "the guy". Spoke to a woman, who sent me to a tire guy, but he tells me he only does cars. Couldn't give me any help as to where I should go, I assumed he didn't want to help the ******. Turns out, after several car only tire guys, a moto guy is hard to find in Otavalo, and probably many places in Ecuador. From what I can gather, for some ridiculous reason, unlike other places in Latin America where 5 year old children can drive motos without helmets, here in Ecuador you need to obtain a license before riding…..so there are less bikers, and thus less moto specific shops. They exist, but it isn't like the days I was driving around Colombia.

I stop and talk to some moto police, surely they know…they send me off in a direction where I eventually find a young kid who tells me no problem. Great, I will return with the bike. I come back and the kid is gone, and the father wont touch it….sigh. Eventually I find a bicycle shop that also claims to work on motos, though I saw no indication of this aside from the "Honda", and "Moto Yama" painted on his storefront….who cares, this is now the guy! We pop off the tire and while he works I talk to the locals who are obviously drawn to the ****** in distress for the next 30 or so minutes. The guy asks for 6 bucks…no no sir, you have helped me immensely, here is 10$, plus, its been a blast hanging out here. He wants me to come back after he closes, there is talk of Anna, who is described as "tall and fat". Not sure if he is trying to sell me, so I tell him I am not sure where I will be later, maybe, though she sounds "nice". Time to get the F out of Octavalo.

I return to Quito after an afternoon of back roads for one last night, ready to head south to the Quilotoa Loop. Once I get down to the start of the loop I have routing issues with the GPS, but its fairly easy enough to make my way through the back roads. I see a bit of everything, even sandy switchbacks on a steep mountainside which sucked, but that's all part of the adventure. I make it to the laguna earlier than I expected, it is cold up here, so rather than stay at the local hostel I push on thinking of the warm volcanic thermal baths of Banos further south. Before departing the mighty Suzuki draws a group of bikers also parked at the lagunas attention. I Chat with them for a bit, and mention how I have seen so many Ecuadorian riders in full protective gear. Not everyone of course, but he told me there was 1 store in Quito where they could buy gear, and that is why I see guys decked out in some nice stuff from head to toe. When I asked him about the riders in Ecuador, his response was yes, there are "enough"…which may have been too many for his taste. I give them a head start out so as not to t show them up with the Suzuki. They all have nice bikes, and equally nice gear on, loving the protection awareness I am seeing here, not sure if it is more safety, or social status, but it is good to see.

I didn't make it to Banos, so decided to stop in Ambato due to the time of evening. Latacunga would have probably been a better choice for things going on as it is a stop off for people who want to tackle Cotopaxi, but at the time I knew nothing of either. Ambato is just a city, doesn't sound like it has much to offer tourists, but I am no expert. Naturally, I walked around to grab some grub and people watch. Don't think I saw any gringoes, though I am sure 1 or 2 stumble through at times. I decide since I am so close to Banos to loop up north and around a bit on backroads showing on my GPS to kill time and explore, so I arrive in Banos around 3 the next afternoon.

Banos is slightly less touristy than I imagined, though don't be fooled it is touristy, and there are plenty of gringoes here, but there are more Ecuadorian tourists here, which is a plus. I struggle to find some good food, so hit the local market both days. Banos sits right in the path of the active Tungurahua volcano, though sadly the last eruption was in March and there is currently no lava flow (or is that gladly?). It provides natural hot baths full of minerals and miracles, so that is the main draw for people here. Banos from above looks very nice, once in town, it is rundown, not in a dangerous way, just not a nice looking place. It felt completely safe though, as is most of Ecuador.

I decide to stay here 2 nights rather than move, so leave my stuff and ride out to Volcan Chimborazo, an inactive, though immensely impressive volcano a couple hours away. It is the largest mountain in Ecuador, and the farthest point from the center of the earth. Basically, all you bitches climbing Everest have nothing on me. I stick to the paved roads today, and run from Banos, through Ambato to the Volcano, following the road around the volcano which take me down to Riobamba and back here to Banos. Its an easy ride, but my *** hurts, damn this little clown bike…the thermal baths will have their work cut out for them tonight.

On my way back to Banos, I stop at a small store in the middle of nowhere for some water, and a sandwich. I could have easily been in and out in 1 minute, but the owner starts up a conversation with me which last 10 or so minutes. I really enjoyed the stop, and think about how often people here have just started chatting with me. Those little "tiendas" are what I look for when I need something, even f there is a supermarket around, though trust me there was not that day. Not thinking too much of it, later the same day I stop by a local store in Banos to grab some water again, and the girl there keeps me in her tiny store for over 30 minutes as we talk about anything and everything, while customers come and go. The people here really are friendly, not just a hello how are you, but they will gladly sit and talk to you with interest.

Cuenca, Ecuador
After leaving Banos I continued on South, eventually arriving in Cuenca. Cuenca is apparently a beautiful colonial city, but they are currently tearing it to shreds to build what I assume is going to be a trolly that runs around town…so the beautiful part was not present for me, lots of construction, gates, etc. Still an ok city to walk around in and check out the sites, but this time of year Ecuador is empty. I have stayed at large Hotels where I am pretty sure I am the only person in them, same with small hostels. I see some non Ecuadorian tourists now and then, but overall I have been a bit underwhelmed by my destinations. The getting from point A to B is excellent, the Andes are amazing, I could spend months riding around on dirt roads which lead me to nowhere, but not having a travel partner in Ecuador at times has been harder than other countries, so I don't always know what to do with myself.

From Cuenca I continued south to Vilcabamba, based on a conversation I had some travelers I met in Quito, as they had regretted not making it down there before their trip had ended. I hated this place, for the reasons above. It is a nice, tranquil, do nothing town, good weather, and plenty of hiking around, but with a rented bike and a ticking clock I am not interested in that. I saw about 10 other travelers in town the 2 days I was there, a group of 2 or 3 here, another there, as well as a couple of expats, nothing going on just a few hippies looking to do drugs. The majority of people would hangout at the restaurants and cafes setup by expats, not my thing…I came here to give my money to the locals. I chilled on a sidewalk for about 30 minutes people watching while I waited for a table to open up at a small place which appeared to be run by a local, and the food was great for 3 dollars a plate. Now, the place I ate at also had a pair of travelers, so I am not trailblazing here, or claiming that I am better than everyone else even though I am cough, but it is strange to me when you see people hanging out at a cafe or restaurant run by an expat rather than the real deal, but some people like comfort, to each their own. Of course full disclosure, I don't like the food here, so have eaten at a Burger King, McDonlads, KFC, and Carls Jr. so pot meet kettle.

The only reason I did 2 days here was I wanted to take the bike further south before heading back north. Had a fun ride on the road south headed towards Peru, and kept forgetting I was not on my 2 year adventure and needed to turn around, I am sure the guys wouldn't even miss this little DR200 if I kept going and never came back. They told me I could get around 200km on the tank before the reserve came on, I missed a turn down a dirt road I had originally setout to explore, so when I hit 100 turned around and returned to Vilcabamba for 1 more night, though considered going an hour north to the city of Loja, which I probably should have done in hindsight.

Zaruma, Ecuador
After that, I hit up the mountain town of Zaruma. I liked it here, had great weather, and you can walk all over and get some great shots of this town which sits up in the mountains, the roads are steep, and I didn't see any gringos, sometimes a plus. Zaruma is apparently know for containing some of Ecuadors most beautiful women, and while I saw a few, there was nothing going on at 7pm on the Fri I was there, so I returned to the hotel to settle in. Where do these beautiful women hide at night, I am sure I would have enjoyed it much more had I found some, I must be going to bed too early. Unfortunately the next morning is when I got the previous bad news, so the trip has been a bit meh since then, certainly jading my views on the places I am visiting, don't let me discourage you, Ecuador is great.

Not all the food is bad, just sick of the main choices, Hamburger with fries, hotdog with fries, chicken with fries, meat with fries. This plate was HUGE, but I wouldn't let it defeat me. Even when I order Hamburguesa, they cannot resist throwing in some Salchipapas! (fries with cut up hotdog, everyone's eating them) From there I looped around near Malacha solely to take back roads towards the southern route through Cajas national park as I returned to Cuenca. I thoroughly enjoyed this journey, as 75% of it was on dirt roads taking me through the mountains, it was just what I needed for my state of mind at the time. It starts off on straight, fast paced roadways which I could have done without, but once you turn onto the dirt road things get good again. After hours of meandering around back there I did start to worry, it was cold, I didn't know how long the journey would take me. The area looked like it must be a national park, but there were no signs indicating this. The thought of sleeping in my adventure suit huddled behind some rocks constantly crossed my mind, as some of the area was very desolate. When I pulled up to the gate for Cajas, I asked the guy how long it would take to get to Cuenca. 30 minutes or so…Yes! I thought I would have to sleep without a tent I told him, beaming with happiness at the thought of a nice warm bed. Turns out this gate was the entrance by Cuenca, and I vaguely recalled am open gate hours ago that had no sign or person around, not even realizing I had entered the park yet. It was more than 30 minutes, but I blame the Suzuki.

The next morning I hit up the northern route through the park, it is also beautiful, but you are only in the park for about 20 minutes or so, so if you are ok with dirt roads take the southern route at some point if you can, there was a mix of everything, but it is not that bad assuming you know your limits. From there I headed west, time to check out the Ecuadorian beach life.

Ok, so I have to get the bike back to Quito, still had a few days to go so decided to try my luck on the coast and see if I catch any waves. Not the best time of year for waves but not the worst, so I head west. The roads straighten out and turn flat for awhile, but the coast itself has nice easy winding roads that follow along the edge at times, though the best riding is obviously in the mountains.

I was debating between hitting up Playas or Salinas, both have southern facing beaches which increase my odds this time of year. As I arrived at the turn off for Playas I saw it was closed. It was not overly obvious how to get over there, though one car decided the closed sign was optional. I was cruising along a highway at a good legal pace, so decided to continue on west to Salinas rather than pull a U-turn and investigate, thanks Universe.

I arrived in Canoa early, and as I suspected it was dead being mid week, so I did a lap and continued north, looking to cut down on the next days longer ride to get me somewhere close to Quito for a problem free return. Didn't know where I was going to stay, but could tell Pedernales was a good sized place from signage, and recalled reading something about it. Turns out it was a popular resort town with the people of Ecuador, just my kind of scene. Unfortunately in April of 2016 it was devastated by a 7.8, and while 5 months had passed, it looked like it had been 5 days.

But in a way it was just what I needed, a stop that wasn't on the typical ****** trail, and a perfect example of how life goes on. The place was full of activity, if people were not selling their crap, they were rebuilding something. Many shops were destroyed, but the crap would be setup in the front area, sometimes even out the back of a semi truck. If I am going to stay somewhere it might as well be here, whatever little money I spend is certainly needed. It took me awhile to find a hotel that was actually operating, but there are a couple, and if you head out on the peninsula the hotels/hostels out there seem to be less affected, but you might as well stay in town and spend money there.
I stopped in Atacames for a night, nothing going on this day. Walked around a little, went back to the hotel, then did the same that night. This place is defiantly ready to handle a party, they have the neon lights and loud music, just no people this time of year I guess.
One of the guys I was talking to had me sit on his bike….oooh, after 2.5 weeks my seat feels like cement, we should trade bikes Senior. Now I just have to find some white paint.

I looped up around the coast making my way north of Quito. Not wanting to stay in Otolavo yet again, I headed to Ibarra to see something new, it was a decent enough city, the surrounding area looked like it had good exploration potential.

After the side trips I made one last stop before heading back to Quito. This tourist trap wanted 5 dollars to take a motorcycle in, but that is not how I roll. I said to hell with that, jump the fence, wheeled around the monument a few times with both middle fingers in the air yelling this is for America….and then during my moment of pure greatness the clown bike slid out of control in a fiery blaze coincidentally landing on both sides of the equator, so I snapped a tourist pic to try and blend in with the crowd. It was then back to Quito to return the bike, and catch a flight back to the US I thoroughly enjoyed my trip to Ecuador, while it wasn't my favorite country visited, it was great to be back in Latin America, driving around the Andes, meeting very friendly people. I never felt as if I shouldn't be in an area due to safety reasons, and think Ecuador is a great entry way to Latin America if someone is just looking for a taste, without all the tourists. FreedomBikeRental made it very easy, and their setup was part of my reasoning for choosing this country. Ecuador is small enough where you can get a bit of everything, and a motorcycle is great way to experience it, but after 3 weeks on the clown bike I was ready to head home. Also, all of my conversations have been in Spanish, while I am not fluent I can converse…I do not think there is much English down here at all, but have not resorted to it either, you have been warned.

Oh hell, one for the road, Salchipapas!!!

 

[Wiley]

The Hits Keep Coming-Baja California
Posted on April 7, 2017 by Wiley

Baja California, Mexico
As previously mentioned, for some unknown reason, I still get hits to the site after all this time, so might as well keep it alive. This one was just a quick one across the border to see the whales, been putting that trip off for 7 years!

Found myself with a short transition period between jobs, so I immediately headed south hoping I would change my mind about the new job and just keep going. As usual this unplanned change in jobs left me unprepared, I took off knowing I had a set of bald-ish tires, a debit card that was shut down once I was south of the border, a window without health insurance while bouncing around solo south of the border, and no real plan aside from trying to catch the grey whales before they headed north in a week or so.

This time I crossed at Tecate and then south to Ensenada before cutting across to the Sea of Cortez and San Felipe. As I suspected it was not my kind of place, but I see the alure it may have for others. In the future I will most likely go this way to avoid traffic, and it is a more scenic way south, plus something I hadn't done, who doesn't like new routes? I grabbed some cash in Ensenada, but it was here that I realized my card may be shut down. I knew I had enough for gas to continue to Guerrero ***** and the whales, and then return to the US, but any unforseen issues like a break down or broken arm would be a tough one to handle. I had a tent if my credit card was shut down, though even hotels were cash only at times.

Guerrero ***** exists purely for the salt mine, and the whales. There is nothing going on, a few restaurants, hotels, and shops, gas and a bank, but that is it. I grabbed a hotel that would take my card, rode down to the bank only to be declined again, stopped in at a tour shop to add my name to a list, and then waited for tomorrow since nothing was happening today.

Tomorrow came, so I headed over to the tour place at 7:30am. I left all my crap in their office which was nice, as I hadn't asked the day before, but didnt want a hotel again as I planned to bounce immediately after hunting whales. We left at 8, took a 30 minute ride across the salt mine area while we got a tour explanation of everything salt related rather than the whales we were going to see….oh yes, I am back in Mexico. Then a quick 10-15 minute boat ride brought us to this:
[imghttp://2guys1truck.com/pictures/Travel%20Resized/2017/01%20Baja%20California-Moto/Guerrero%20Negro%20Grey%20Whales/2017%20Baja%20California%20Grey%20Whales%20003.JPG[/img]
[imghttp://2guys1truck.com/pictures/Travel%20Resized/2017/01%20Baja%20California-Moto/Guerrero%20Negro%20Grey%20Whales/2017%20Baja%20California%20Grey%20Whales%20011.JPG[/img]
[imghttp://2guys1truck.com/pictures/Travel%20Resized/2017/01%20Baja%20California-Moto/Guerrero%20Negro%20Grey%20Whales/2017%20Baja%20California%20Grey%20Whales%20039.JPG[/img]
[imghttp://2guys1truck.com/pictures/Travel%20Resized/2017/01%20Baja%20California-Moto/Guerrero%20Negro%20Grey%20Whales/2017%20Baja%20California%20Grey%20Whales%20060.JPG[/img]
We returned around 12:30, so I loaded the bike and headed for a quick trip south wanting to hit San Ignacio for the whales tomorrow. As I got to the Y leaving Guerrero ***** I pulled a typical move and turned her north, the whales were awesome, after a 7 year wait they did not disappoint, so I decided to go back and play it safe, no cash, no health insurance, etc. I rode up to El Rosario, spent the night there, and then back north to the US, quick trip down, cannot believe I have never been in March, what a great time of year to visit Baja.

November 2017??
Colombia
So I took a moto vacation in Colombia, bought a cheap Chinese bike, which I still own and keep in Colombia, just in case I find myself back there. Photo bomb

February 2018??
Some friends heard about my Baja tales and decided to go the following year. When they told me they were renting van in TJ and drving down I said hell no, I am taking the bike and meeting you there, it's Baja! We hit up Guerrero ***** for the whales, and Baja Conception for some relaxation. This ones just a photo bomb.

 

[Wiley]

Since I have been piggybacking other moto trips, figured I would throw up my recent 6 weeks riding a Chinese motorcycle around Vietnam and Laos. Thanks

Vietnam (Approx Oct 1st-31st 2018)

I flew into Southern Vietnam, specifically Ho Chi Minh City/Saigon, the city goes by both names depending on who you talk to. I had no real plans or itinerary, just figured I would get tips from other travelers as I worked my way North, the backpacker trail is well worn here. The city is full of people, noise, and great food, nothing boring about this place, in your face Singapore.

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To get into Vietnam there are couple options regarding visas, and Americans MUST get a visa prior to just showing up, even if it is still a visa on arrival. Rules and regulations constantly change, and I am far from an expert, so do your homework. 1st, if you think you may pick up a motorcycle to take into Laos or Cambodia, DO NOT go with the "evisa" option. You can also get one ahead of time by stopping by an embassy, but I chose to go online and then pick it up on arrival. This only works if you are flying in, not at the land borders, for that you will need an embassy I believe. I myself used an online agent, of course I have since deleted the emails so do not know who I used or how much it was. The general process consisted of paying them to get me an approval letter, I chose a 3 month multi-entry visa in case I needed to leave and come back, but figured 1 month would not be enough. I don't recall how much the agency charged, but go with one that is reliable, as there used to be a problem with scams in the past...I will see if I can find it in a credit card statement. You have to pick your entry day, you cannot enter prior to this date, but can arrive any day after that date. In my case since I showed up 2 months after it, I only had 1 month remaining as the clock will start regardless to what day you show up. Once this letter was emailed to me, I had to bring this letter, along with the arrival form (Link provided) I previously filled out to save time, and 2 passport photos up to the counter, just follow everyone getting off the plane, this is prior to the customs or baggage pickup. I gave them my paperwork and sat and waited for 15-30 minutes. Then you will have to pay, so make sure you bring some US dollars with you, for a 30 day multi entry I had to pay 50 USD for the stamp, I think a 1 month is 25, but verify. After that you can clear customs just like any other airport.

Hotels and hostels are plentiful in the city, so I exited the airport and took the yellow bus (Bus 109) for a whopping 0.80 cents from the airport to the last stop which is a bus station located in district 1, where everyone stays. I grabbed a hostel in an alley off the main strip, which helps keep things a bit quieter than staying on the main streets of Bui Vien and Pham Ngo Lao. There are plenty of bars and restaurants located here, and things are in walking distance, though I am sure there would be better locations within the city if you want to get away from this type of crowd, it is definitely backpacker central here. Luckily there was a great group at the hostel I stayed at, probably true of most in the area. Every night about 10 of us from around the globe would go grab some dinner, and possibly too many drinks, so I stayed in the city for a day or so longer than planned. The problem with this group, was that there was a Canadian who had driven a motorbike down from Northern Vietnam, his buddy had ditched him temporarily for the Vietnamese chick he had picked up, so when he and I would hang out he was unknowingly rubbing the moto trip in my face.

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I skipped most of the tourist stuff, heard mixed reviews of the Mekong Delta tour, as well as the Cu Chi tunnels, so said no thanks. I did go to the war museum, and ht up the local market where someone taught the locals a few key phrases. Every stall sold the same crap, and they all said the same thing, "Hello sir, would you like to buy a shirt". "Hello sir, what are you looking for", it was like walking through a pet shop full of parrots. Somehow a lunch turned into a Heineken tour, even though I don't like Heineken, but it included an observation deck to view the city, and a few free beers so I followed along. The tour was strange, they had a virtual reality presentation thing that was completely unnecessary, Foosball, pictures with virtual backgrounds, and a DJ table which I did jump on to get the party started...basically the corporate aholes sat down and said how can we drag this out for an hour before giving them beer. They did give a personalized bottle of beer, and while I thought I was being clever when I wrote my name as "Wiley Washere", they must have seen this trick before as they even added the space for me. We finally got to drink and relax in the bar, and then after that we left and ended up at a couple more bars. Eventually we even ended up at some club the Vietnamese girl the Canadian was with dragged us to, but for some reason they didn't let me get on the tables and spin the wax. Otherwise I just explored the city, and ate lots of cheap food, which I prefer to the tourist stuff anyway.

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The stories of biking across Vietnam were haunting me, so on one of the days I swung by a shop to check out options, but in the end didn't buy/rent anything. I later mentioned this to the Canadian and he said his friend probably hadn't even tried to sell his yet since he had been distracted with his Vietnamese girl, so a few texts were sent and 20 minutes later I now owned bike number 3.

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Now most motorcyclists fill their garage with motorcycles, but not me, I buy and strategically place them around the world. I have my main one in Socal to enjoy Cali and Mexico, another stored in Colombia for the rare trip back to S. America, and now a bike in Vietnam. Why Vietnam, well buying a bike in Vietnam is easy as there are constantly travelers going back and forth between HCMC and Hanoi, selling crappy Chinese knock-offs that have probably exchanged owners at least 1000 times each, and sure to break down. All you need to do is hand them cash in exchange for the "blue card" you do not need to register or associate the bike to your name in any way, which is why I can just give it away if things go bad. The added benefit of owning a Vietnamese plated bike is that it is easier to get them out of the country, in case I decide to push on into Laos and Cambodia. Thailand used to also be easy to get into though that has changed, but I have been there done that, so hoping to just get Laos and Cambodia if anything. Now it was time to figure out how to get myself and this Chinese crap bike out of this city, traffic is a nightmare, and since I didn't bring my GPS, I had to use my phone, which meant driving a few minutes, pulling over to see I had missed a turn, and repeating. Finally...the adventure I had been looking for.

2 years driving through Mexico, Central America, and Colombia and I paid 0 bribes, 1 Hour driving in Vietnam and I am already losing the battle. Oh well, 20 bucks let me keep my bike, I think it was worth it.

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Now, I am not claiming to be a master at avoiding bribes, but they certainly tried to get my money when I was south of the border. Even when 2 Colombian cops stopped me and tried to sweat me out for 30 or so minutes, 1 of them making a slicing motion across his throat while telling me "I was in big trouble", I never wavered.....but this time was different, this time I was unprepared.

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My odometer is broken, distances from Google:
Ho Chi Minh City/Saigon to Cat Tien: 154KM
Cat Tien to De Lat: 164KM
De Lat to Nha Trang: 135KM
Nha Trang to Qui Nhon: 214KM
Vietnam total: 667KM (414 Miles)

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As I had purchased the bike on a whim I had done no research on Moto travel within Vietnam for this trip, though it has been on my list of potential adventures so had previously looked into some of the aspects of it, but after buying the actual bike, I had no idea how to proceed, or much of what lay ahead for me. Since traffic is on a another level in Saigon, I did some quick googling looking for the best way out of the city and read by heading north, rather than east, I could avoid some of the heavy traffic, as well as the corrupt cops that lie in between Saigon and Mui Ne. This would give me about 2 hours of heavy traffic as opposed to 4, and since I had no plans to go to Mui Ne would minimize any cop related issues. I did bring an international drivers license just in case I rented a bike in any of these countries, but I do not believe Vietnam recognizes these, there is a lot of confusion about it online, they seem to simply look the other way when it comes to foreigners on to wheels.

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I headed North towards Cat Tien, leaving Saigon around 10am, as I had read traffic would not be bad since rush hour was coming to an end. 1 of many problems with the bike is that there is no speedomoter, so I cannot really say that I wasn't speeding, but it was obvious why I was pulled over from the start. I had started to pull over to the side of the road as I saw what I thought were food vendors setup down the road, and wanted to check my GPS since I am using my phone, and need to take it out of my pocket and check it every few minutes in the city traffic. This obviously resulted in me SLOWING DOWN, but I then see it is a police check point, so I quickly put my blinker on and return to the main flow of traffic hoping to blend in, which clearly did not work.

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I saw a cop get excited and wave his baton around indicating for me to pull over, oh shit. He tells me I was speeding and I instantly argue, dammit I shouldn't have spoke English now he knows we can communicate, I am clearly out of practice for this. Again I was slowing down, so I was a bit pissed that this cop was clearly going to bribe me. He tell me "Vietnamese license", something I obviously do not have, but I grab my international license telling him it's "international". He doesn't object as he looks it over, but I didn't get the impression he cared since he kept telling me it was 55kph. I agree telling him yes, 45 pointing to my bike since they don't use radar guns, but again he doesn't care. In less than two minutes he makes it clear why he pulled me over...."monies, you go".

Again I don't know if this license had any weight, or what a Vietnamese jail is like, so I keep asking myself why I am arguing with him, but I cannot stop. To keep this easy we will just go with USD, he tells me he wants 128USD. I immediately laugh, state a firm no, and low ball him and counter with 4.30USD, I didn't necessarily mean to go that low but when I threw out the amount in Dong, it took me a second to calculate what it was equivalent to but then stuck to my guns. "NO, 128USD" he demanded. "No, 4.30USD", I am being pretty blatant with my No's. Sometimes I counter with "I am not paying", and eventually he threatens to keep my license. I should have acted like I was upset by this, but he could tell I didn't care. He lowers to 85USD, so I play the game and bump my offer up to 6.45 haha. He gets mad, counters, and I drop it back down to 4.30. That really pissed him off, so he threatens to take my bike. This is all going on while we stand next to a flat bed truck, so I am asking myself if this is a bluff, or if my bike will end up in the back only 1 hour after its maiden voyage. Meanwhile there are about 10 other cops pulling over locals left and right, they come and go quickly, it is quite the spectacle, but I am too preoccupied to see who is actually paying money, but it looks like everyone is getting shaken down.

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I eventually tell him no and sit on my bike indicating I am done playing his game, this really pisses him off. I think I could have used these tactics to my advantage as they do not want people seeing what they are up to, but really I have no idea how far I can push him, so listen to him when he tells me to get off the bike and come back over to him. At this time, a cop pulls over someone else, and in true stereotypical fashion, a scooter driven by an Asian comes barreling in, almost colliding with 2 other cops. 1 of the cops gets pissed, and swings his baton at the guy. I can't tell if he was trying to hit him or just scare him, but decide maybe I should pay the bribe and get the F out of here, as he looked pretty serious. I work my way to 20USD, which is probably still to high, and ignore his gesture to be nonchalant, pulling the bill from my wallet, holding it up for all to see verifying the amount as if I do not know what 500,000 dong is equivalent to, "500 yes??". Again, he gets pissed, but gets my money and tells me "you go now, you go". I slowly pack my bag up, taking my sweet as time, and pull out revving that little bike as much as it would go, looking down at my shifter acting like it was stuck as I pull away. In hindsight I am actually surprised I didn't find out what that baton felt like.

I get to Cat Tien in the afternoon, and word must have spread about the shakedown, as soon as I check in the woman running the hotel I stayed at gave me some cake! Ok, so it might have been her birthday, but the cake was delicious aside from the candle chunk I found inside. There was an Aussie guy with a German girl, so we took off for some dinner. These two picked up bikes having little to no experience between the 2 of them. Now I wont harp on it after this, but I have met way too many people doing this. Vietnam is heavily populated, things are hectic, they do not drive well, constantly pull out in front of you, and the buses and trucks do not care about the motorcyclists. Luckily everyone drives very slowly, but Vietnam really is not a place to be learning how to ride, I strongly suggest you rent a bike at home so you can focus on the bike and driving, without all the added challenges.

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Cat Tien is a national park, but I had no plans on checking it out, so the next day I take off headed to De Lat, all I know about that place is it is located in the mountains, and is known for it's nice cool climate, YES! Vietnam has been hot, so I could use the change. I didn't leave super early, so with lunch, and stopping for photos I get in around 4pm. Traffic was crazy in the city, turned out all the students were off so everyone had headed to town for some partying. I do not know how it is normally, but it was crazy the day I got in. To add to the chaos, there are lots of roundabouts, and I do not have a clue where I should be going. I grab a hostel and am not impressed with De Lat at all, but the hostel was good, and I signed up for the "family dinner". They cooked those of us who signed up a nice meal, and we all got to know each other. Everyone is going to go out for drinks, quite excited for it, but I am a bit tired so decline, asking myself why these people are so gung ho to go out on a Sunday. I was still hungry after the meal so went walking for food, when I found a large area where they had closed off the streets, full of people, vendors, and food. I am looking at a pizza treat of some sort I have not seen previously debating if I should try it, when some guys from Saigon who can speak a bit of English tell me it's good, and to try it out. They tell me the price so now that I know I am not going to get ripped off I sit down and enjoy the tasty treat. They give me the low down on some things about Vietnam, and I eventually leave them to go find desert. I walk around a bit s De Lat starts to grow on me. I go back to the hostel ready for bed and find it empty aside from the person at reception, literally everyone has gone out, savages. Well of course as has happened all to often in my previous travels I was off on my days, as it was Saturday night, which is why everyone wanted to go out so I missed out, oh well.

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From De Lat I head to Nha Trang..."Russians". Well, that is the 1st word I hear anytime anyone mentions Nha Trang, which is a popular destination for Russian and Chinese tourists. Everything I read says to skip it, I even got a tip or two on where I could go instead from people at the De Lat family dinner, but I wanted to check it out. Plus the drive there took me over a pass where I got my 1st real taste of Vietnam's spectacular scenery. The previous days were fine, but nothing special, the pass, while brief, was great, and offered many photo opportunities, especially for newly weds apparently. After some nice mountain roads I arrived in Nha Trang a bit early, so it wasn't a terrible long day. I grabbed a hostel, and naturally went out for food. I grabbed myself a delicious burger, and I do not regret it! Vietnamese food is fantastic, but sometimes, you need some comfort food, and anytime I finish a ride here in Vietnam I find myself craving burgers, and a good one is hard to find here. I searched for a burger place since it is a large city, and when I saw so many positive google reviews I knew where I was headed. I then walked the boardwalk, and just kind of wandered around. I didn't mind Nha Trang, and there are some beautiful Russian women which is a nice plus. It also looked like it would have a decent night life, but I didn't check it out, so just used it as a stopping place, something I do for most of Vietnam as that visa clock is always ticking.

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The next day was a long drive, as I wanted to drive the ninh van bay peninsula to check out the recommendation from the family dinner group before continuing up the coast. I had read it was great back in the day as well, but now it kind of sucks. The drive out was a waste of my time, I only recommend it if you do not want to go to Nha Trang, and stay the night at the end of the peninsula....but to drive there and back round trip was a complete waste, and the area itself is filling up with resorts and condos, so has lots of construction going on...sadly I have missed the window on this place, which seems true for most of coastal Vietnam. Everywhere that was worth checking out at some point is now being over run with construction and tourists. Of course I live at the beach, so it is tough for me to get excited about them, maybe you will love them, but I wasn't feeling it, but still had another day or two of the coastal route I planned to follow. I then continued North which took me through some nice looking areas with fishing villages, passed blue ocean waters, and a good portion of boring old flat highway, until finally arriving in Qui Nhon late in the evening.

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Qui Nhon was nice enough, a good sized small city, which people use as a base to check out beaches around the area. I only spent the night, and pushed on towards Kon Tum, as it was time to leave the coast and start ridding in the mountains, where I constantly read the real fun begins. This is where I will pick up the legendary Ho Chi Minh Highway, a system of roads which connect the Southern city of Saigon with the Northern city of Hanoi, and possibly goes all the way to China present day. This road runs through the mountains which border Cambodia/Laos, and played a crucial role in the "America/Vietnam War", but more importantly, had some great twisties and scenery for motorcycle riders. I could have picked it up sooner, but wanted to see what the beach scene was all about. I enjoyed the places I hit up, but would probably forgo them next time, but they were not bad in any way. I also plan on heading back to hit the popular locations such as Hoi An, or De Nang, before fully committing to the mountains.

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All photos provided in this post are prior to the trip to Kon Tum, so as you can see there is still some very scenic mountain riding where I went, and the beaches have their moments, but I found things generally got better the farther north I went. Depending on how much time you have, I either recommend you start in Hanoi and focus only on the North, or start in Saigon like I did and head north. Many people go North to South, and comment that while it is nice, they cant help be feel slightly disappointed after starting in such an amazing area of the North and working their way South.

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Free tea and bananas were great at 1st, a few chain tightenings or general maintenance type things done to the bike on the house....but then it was free beers and rice wine, and eventually free diners. The kids light up with excitement when they see me coming, running to the street and yelling "hellllllo" followed by a friendly wave. I have even had fans in the street stopping me for photos on a few occasions, clearly die hard followers of 2Guys1Truck. Finally living the life I deserve, these people get me.

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Yes it is the Rockstar life in Vietnam, my fame has now gone worldwide. People were friendly in the South, still friendly in the North but much more reserved, but Central Vietnam might just have the most friendly people on this planet. It is probably what I enjoy most about this country, yes the food is great, and the motorcycle riding is phenomenal, but seeing the joy I bring to these kids really makes this place special. My ego will miss this place.

Qui Nhon to Kon Tum: 190KM
Kon Tum to Hoi An: 298KM
Hoi An to De Nang: 30KM
De Nang to Hue: 102KM
Hue to Khe Sanh: 133KM
Khe Sanh to Phong Nha: 222KM
Phong Nha to Huong Khe: 136KM
Huong Khe to Cam Thuy: 300KM
Total for Vietnam: 2078KM (1291 Miles)

So I left Qui Nhon and headed inland, knowing it would be a brief detour through the mountains before heading back to the coast. This was not the most efficient way for me to get to the popular cities of Hoi An or De Nang, but I had read good things about the drive through Kon Tum via the Ho Chi Minh Road, and those of you who have followed this blog over the years know I do not know the meaning of efficient.

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The Ho Chi Minh Road roughly coincides with the legendary Ho Chi Minh Trail that played a key role during the American/Vietnam war, which was a network of roads running through Vietnam, Laos, and Cambodia. It will someday run the entire length of Vietnam all the way to China, and once completed will eventually be around 2,000 miles long. Why do I care, because it contains some of the best scenery on the planet, combining some of my favorites: mountains, rivers, twisties, and switchbacks. I am now leaving Southern Vietnam and entering Central Vietnam, where the riding gets much better.

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The 1st few hours inland were pleasant, I had blue skies and good roads with gentle curves taking me through the countryside and through random villages. It was a nice change after the coastal highway full of idiots driving scooters and trucks, which was also flat and straight....boring. The scenery was nice but nothing spectacular, I struggle to recall the drive prior to hitting the mountains, as it has been several weeks since I have been in Southern Vietnam at this point. That said, I can remember the exact moment when I hit the mountains, and started the climb. It was a steep ascent, and the twisties started almost immediately. The view of the valley I was leaving behind was fantastic, I can vividly picture it in my mind, which is good since I took ZERO pictures.

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Yes, unfortunately, it was a long day of driving, or maybe I stopped too often for pics prior to hitting the mountains, but at some point I noticed I had 130 kms and not much time left before the sun was setting. Now 130 kms is only 80 miles, but any number of kms in Vietnam can take much longer than expected due to the road condition, the constant ascending and descending of mountains, weather, and many other reasons, so I knew I had to book it if I was going to make it to Kon Tum before nightfall. I honestly did not think I would make it, and was a bit nervous to where I would be staying as this route gets you out into the middle of nowhere. The plus here, I made that bike move like it was designed to. Generally I prefer to not push it, back home I drive fairly relaxed and keep things in check, but I did not want to be driving at night, so by being forced to push it a bit I was able to enjoy a great road on a crappy Chinese bike. The problem with this is there are animals all over the place, plus village people walking around, potholes, landslides, you know the drill. As I cruised up a particular section of mountain with my motor humming, a group of guys were chilling on the side and heard me coming, and as I flew past they raised their hands in the air with approval. Out here I started to get a few hellos, waves, and smiles...the people of Vietnam can be very friendly. If I don't get a hello they at least stare as drive by, or especially when I walk around the small towns. It does take some getting used to, but sometimes my ego loves the attention. All eyes will be on you no matter what, if you are trying to get away, relax, or happen to have social anxiety, Vietnam is not the place for you!

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The road was a typical mountain road, narrow and a bit bumpy with occasional potholes, but generally pretty good. Luckily I made it to Kon Tum just as night fell. It was dark, and I realized that both my head light and tail light were not working. Luckily, half of the bikes in Vietnam are like this, so the only worry was someone hitting me. Kon Tum doesn't have much going on for it, but there was a good selection of street food and the people were friendly, saying hello and asking where I was from. The farther north I go the more friendly they seem to be. The only foreigners passing through are on motorcycles, so I am definitely not the first, but the numbers are low. I believe the only ones in this small city, were myself, 4 Aussies, and a French Canadian. It's actually a good sized city so I am sure there were others hiding somewhere.

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Walking home from my street food adventure, I turned onto the road with my hotel. This street was not lit well, but straight, wide, and empty. I watch a scooter which is passing me in the same direction, as it crashes into the steep sidewalk which was about a foot off the road. Sparks fly as the scooter slides along the sidewalk/road like a bowling ball in the gutter, with the driver tumbling across the sidewalk. Oh shit, I freeze, feeling like I should go check on the driver but knowing it will be tough to help with the language barrier. There are 2 scooters a good distance behind who absolutely saw him go down, and drive right past without even looking over at the driver to check on him, something I have read is normal here. This also makes me hesitant to get involved being a foreigner, but I can't ignore him when he is right across the street. He stumbles to his feet and seems ok. Luckily I see a guy come running from the corner, ok good now I am off the hook.

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I continue walking but keep taking a look back to see what transpires, as there was no reason for the guy to have crashed on such a wide open empty street. The helper picks up the bike, and then I see he is going to drive the original driver home, which I think is nice. As they go past me I see the guy who crashed hanging sideways of that back, slowly coming closer and closer to falling as the new driver is trying to hold him up with 1 hand while driving the scooter and trying to come to a stop. Turns out the crash was because the guy was shitfaced, to drunk to drive, and to drunk to be a passenger. I thought crossing the street in Saigon was dangerous due to the number of scooters, but now crossing the street really has me worried.

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I continue north through the mountains often times coming very close to the Laos border. I eventually cut inland in order to hit up Hoi An, a popular tourist destination located on the coast and known for its picturesque lanterns hung all around town. Of course an hour or so outside town I missed my turn, but due to the rain that was just arriving I continued on and ended up in De Nang which is 45 minutes north of Hoi An, meaning I would need to backtrack slightly the next day.

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De Nang is one of the larger cities in Vietnam, and slightly famous for its dragon bridge. I went out with some hostel people and had a great night, but I do not know that it had anything to with De Nang, and would have been fine skipping it, but it certainly wasn't a bad destination. It is a large city with stores and food, plus some bars....which is more than most of the destinations I will be hitting up in the next few weeks.

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The next day I backtracked 45 minutes or so to Hoi An, which was a nice place to relax, but is a bit touristy. I enjoyed it but 1 day would be enough for me, though many people take 2-3 days here to bike around or just plain relax. I ended up staying 2 nights as I had a list of maintenance I wanted to get done with the bike, and was to hung over to get them done the 1st day due to the previous outing in De Nang. To give you an idea on Vietnam prices, I had the guy do the following which included parts and labor:

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Replaced following for 50USD total: Stator (6USD), new front shocks which I could have ignored (30USD), Brakes, headlight/taillight bulbs, weld my rack that had broke, and a couple other misc things finishing off the remaining 15 USD.

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From Hoi An I continued past De Nang heading North, passing over the legendary Hai Van Pass, made famous by the guys on Top Gear, ironically they did not even see the best parts of Vetnam, but the episode is epic. Hai Van Pass is a very beautiful mountain pass with views of the blue sea contrasting with lush green mountains. It is only 21 kms, and located just outside De Nang which makes it very easy for tourists to rent bikes and make the journey. I admit I did not get the beautiful blue skies that others are lucky enough to get though the day was nice enough, I couldn't help but feel it is over hyped. It is definitely a must do, but there were plenty of other passes throughout Vietnam that simply put this one to shame.

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The next stop was Hue, a city full of history which generally bores me, but I was only stopping here as it logistically made sense on my route. I assumed it was US war history, but at least it was from cool shit back in the 1700's. There were 13 emperors who ruled Vietnam from hue, and they are buried around the city. I went to 2 of the burial sites, as well as walked around the citadel which is where they resided. They had a no peasants rule in the city, that's right peasants stay out you are not good enough for us...I like these guys. The sites were all ok but being on a moto adventure makes this stuff kind of lame to me. Plus it is a very touristy city. There is a backpacker neighborhood full of restaurants and bars which cater to tourists, and guides constantly trying to get you to go on a moto tour or sell you weed. If you are busing the country by all means check it out as it is a nice enough place, but the city did not impress me. The reason I spent 2 days here was the guy at the hostel had asked if I could stop by the local school, and mentioned it was difficult to get clean English speakers, those damn Brits or Aussies ruin it for everyone with there terrible accents. He said we would head over at 2pm, so I figured worst case scenario I am stuck there 3 hours, sow as happy to help as well as get the experience with local children.

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I jump on my bike and follow him over the school. We cut through the citadel and I realize the actual citadel city is huge, it probably took us another 10-15 minutes of motoring until we exited the walls on the other side. It is enormous, and has portions of the modern city of Hue withing these walls. We arrive at school where he passes me off and I am given a brief break down of expectations, there is a teacher present but I am leading the class, asking them questions and letting them ask me questions. Here I thought I was just going to go in and speak, but they are giving me a list of topics and things to cover, I am basically teaching on the fly, without getting paid....can I talk to the union?

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I walk into class and in unison they give me the "Hello Teacher, welcome to class, how are you", like a bunch of robots. But it turns out their English is much better than I anticipated, and they are surprisingly well behaved. They are thrilled that I am there, I get a lot of stares from the kids who quickly look away shyly when I look at them. The classroom isn't all that large, yet for some reason I am handed a microphone which is completely unnecessary. We play games with key phrases from my cheat sheet, mostly consisting with "Whats-your-favorite-color...Mine-is-pur-ple". Class ends after 30 or so minutes and I think I am done, but they take me to another class. As I walk in the kid in the back gives me a high five, so naturally every kid wants to high five me. I walk up the isle to the front high fiving everyone I pass like the rockstar I am, yes these kids get me. Class is similar to before but the kids are slightly younger, less behaved, and we cover different topics.

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Turns out school doesn't end at 5 like I assumed, and I am suckered into 6 hours of teaching kids, while each class got younger and less behaved. The obviously sold me with the best kids 1st, knowing I couldn't get free once I was in too deep. The last class had kids who might have been 6, and there was a lot of youtube sing alongs, it was a bit rough. At 8pm it finally ends, but they pay me with delicious food, ok forget everything I said this was great I will be back everyday, they clearly know the way to my heart. Once it was finally done I was quite thankful I had been asked to go, while a long day the kids were fantastic, and it is one of those experiences that I happened to be in the right place at the right time for.

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Leaving Hue an old guy comes up to me and tells me my rear tire is wobbling. Since it is a touristy place I figure it is a scam but am 50 feet from the hostel so go back and ask the guy working to take a look as I drive away, since it feels ok. He immediately tells me it is a scam, so I pull away but look back and see him give the thumbs up. Thinking all is good I continue on, but of course there would in fact be an issue with my rear tire later.

From Hue I go to Khe Sanh, another mountain town. It is another long day with more beautiful scenery, and I arrive feeling I am the only foreigner in town. These places in the mountains are mostly stops of convenience, there is not much going on, and the only foreigners they see are generally other motorcyclists. Even finding food at night is tough, everything is dead. Most towns have a small number of hotels or hostels so that is not a problem. Generally hostels in Vietnam have been 5USD A night, while hotels start at 10USD, though the hostels are often in better shape with more comfortable beds. If you are traveling with a companion you may want to throw in a few extra bucks for the next step up regarding hotels, as they are usually adequate but nothing special. A few have been fantastic for the price, while others are what you would expect for 10USD, but for someone who lived in a van traveling Latin America these places all fill my needs.

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From Khe Sanh it is a long day on the HCMR to get to Phong Nha. This is probably the best ride in all of South/Central Vietnam, as I ride a glorified side walk which is generally in good condition, with minimal traffic through some amazing mountains. I stop at one point to snap some pics of an incredible vista, and by dumb luck, happened to park in front of a family of monkeys. I wouldn't even have known they were there if they hadn't suddenly went crashing through the tree from one branch to the next as they all ran away. Luck would stick with me later as I entered Phong Nha National Park, as I saw 2 more crossing the street, which I assume is a bit rare, as most people need to go with a guide who knows where to find them.

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Phong Nha is famous for not only having the worlds largest cave, but a number of other impressive caves located within the limestone mountains. The largest cave has a wait list of 1 year and costs 3 grand, so most people do not see that one, maybe it doesn't even exist. The other caves were getting mixed reviews from the people I talked to. The only one consistently recommended to me was the dark cave due to zip lining and crawling through mud. That doesn't sound all that great to me so I skipped the caving, since again it is about the ride. I naturally hit up the duck farm though, because that is what tourists do.

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The what farm, yeah that is what I said too. I was talking to the couple from Edmonton at my hostel, and they mentioned the guy from Houston heard I had a bike and was looking for me as he wasn't able to take both girls to the duck farm on his rented scooter due to the cops in the area. Yeah ok that sounds stupid I probably won't be doing that, thinking he is traveling with his daughters and cannot take them to the duck farm, but keep my mouth shut. The guy from Houston eventually shows up, we all sit around chatting and doing the normal hostel meet and greet, and the guy from Edmonton jokes that the real question is if I want the blond or brunette. Oh...."girls", glad I kept my mouth shut. Turns out a couple of British girls they met earlier while caving wanted to go check out the duck farm, and while I had not yet seen if their teeth were straight, didn't want to ruin anyone's fun. Since they needed my bike I made the sacrifice and decided go to the duck farm.

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Well the duck farm was weird, but cheap, and everyone had straight teeth. We fed the ducks, letting them eat out of our hands, off from our laps., as well as off of our bare feet which was awful, did a few other weird things with them and then finally tossed them in a pond. The best part was the delicious food we had at the end, and no we were not served duck.

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Knowing it was only downhill after the duck farm I left the next morning to continue North. Just outside Phong Nha my rear shock fell apart on me. Luckily I found all the parts and was able to limp back to town and have the guy put it back together, along with an oil change, for 5.37USD (an oil change should cost about 3.44USD but can vary widely). Happy to have my bike back together I drove 3 hours from Phong Nha only to realize my passport was still with the hotel reception. Dammit, now I am going to waste a day on the visa staying one more night in Phong Nha.

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The next day with passport in hand I finally continued North, stopping in Huong Khe as it looked like rain was coming. I could have continued further to cover more distance, but decided to stop early and grab a hotel to relax. I had been lucky throughout the trip thus far aside from the 1st day leaving Saigon when I got soaked, so figured this would be a good stopping point. I had read the lake is lined with delicious food stalls which may have also influenced my decision making, but that appears to only be during the summer as there was nothing going on in this town either. I found my only option was some ladies selling street food, but of course that hit the spot. Despite all of this, Huong Khe might have been my favorite town in Central Vietnam. Of all the towns the kids in this one were the best, their faces would light up when they saw me, all yelling hello and enthusiastically waving. Even the older people were very welcoming, I must have said hello to over 200 people as I walked around town, once again I felt like a rockstar. This is another town that is off the radar, and only sees a small number of foreigners.

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I have not been recommending hotels/hostels since they are all pretty much the same, but I will say to avoid the "Hoang Ngoc Hotel". The hotel was nothing special, and a bit dirty but had good reviews on Google. That is not why I think you should avoid it though, I suspect they have a disgruntled employee. There was 1 guy who whenever I said hello to would give off bad vibes, his expression never changed, and he wouldn't respond to my pathetic attempts at Vietnamese. I chalked it up to the language barrier, but a half mile after leaving the hotel my bike dies. Now it's a crappy Chinese bike, they are known for this, so I look over the wires, make sure I have gas, etc. There is a wire that has come loose, which could easily happen from the roads I have taken so I reattach it. The bike still wont start so I start the walk of shame, and push it back to town which luckily I am just on the outskirts. A guy motions about me out of gas, I shake my head no and indicate it is engine related, so he tells me to come into his buddies auto shop. Now there are probably 17 moto mechanics if I keep heading to town, but I agree and decide to see how this plays out. His buddy is eating breakfast so I am given some tea which is standard mechanic protocol as I wait for him to finish. We then remove the spark plug to check for a spark, all good. He fiddles with a few other things and then turns the reserve switch on the gas tank, which releases excess gas. He points, draws a line on my frame to indicate which is off/on, and says I am all set. This is where the disgruntled employee comes in. I don't have proof, but that switch doesn't accidentally get changed, someone would have had to switch it off. The bike did feel like it was out of gas which would make sense a half mile from where I was, as there would have been some gas available. I felt like an idiot for not checking it, but the Canadian I bought the bike from told me the reserve did not work so I didn't bother to mess with it. I googled it before leaving Saigon since that means I can run out of gas and have no spare fuel, which is how the Canadian found out it was broken as he ran out of gas. Turns out it may be clogged, broken, or just installed backwards, but irregardless someone tampered with the switch after I parked at the hotel, so I would avoid that place just in case as there are other hotels in town.

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Huong Khe to Cam Thuy, same old nothing going on, just a stop before heading to Vietnam's hectic capital of Hanoi, and the gateway to the North. The highlight to Cam Thuy was walking around town being the Rockstar, 1 guy came across the street to grab me and try and talk to me. I told him I only knew two words, Hello and Thank you, to which he had a good laugh. But the best was when a little girl grabbed her sisters arm with a look of fear/excitement as if she just saw a bear walk out of the woods. "Holy fuck there is a foreigner here" is what I believe she said, though my Vietnamese is pretty awful.

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This long *** post wraps up Central Vietnam, where a lot of nothing happened, but there was some great riding everywhere I went. The coastal cities have some decent parties going on, but the mountains are a different world, there is not much of a social scene at all. What made the Central special is the friendliness of the people. The people of Central Vietnam are some of the most welcoming I have met in my travels around this planet, it really is amazing, plus it is nice to be surrounded by my 2Guy1Truck fans.

Dog meat just might be delicious

The 1st Vietnamese words I learned were "dog meat", to ensure I did not accidentally eat just that. Now I do not think I have eaten dog meat, but the amount of mystery meat I have eaten is ridiculous, and every time it has been delicious....so if I did unknowingly eat dog meat, it therefore must be delicious.

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"Thit cho" or literally meat dog, is a popular dish in many parts of Vietnam. I have seen the signs advertising this delicacy since my 1st few days in the South once outside Saigon, but it is much more prevalent in the North. It seems the smaller, more remote villages serve it in half of the establishments, and my problem is many establishments do not have signs advertising what they are cooking. The smaller joints often have 1 or two dishes being made, so you kind of have to take what they have, you do not have a choice. It becomes a "point at a meat and hope for the best" kind of deal, and is such a common game for me I stopped asking what they were since I never understood them anyway. But I swear, every time I didn't know what I was eating the meat was F'ing delicious, so I stopped caring.

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Cam Thuy to Hanoi: 125 KM
Hanoi to Thai Nguyen: 67 KM
Thai Nguyen to Bac Kan: 83 KM
Bac Kan to Ban Gioc: 197 KM
Ban Gioc to Beo Lac: 197 KM
Beo Lac to Meo Vac: 86 KM
Meo Vac to Ha Giang: 182 KM
Ha Giang to Sapa: 244 KM
Sapa to Nghia Lo: 231 KM
Nghia Lo to Mai Chau: 229 KM
Mai Chau to Na Meo: 122 KM
Total for Completed Vietnam:
3,841 KM (2,386 Miles!)

Yes I am now in the North, and as I previously alluded to people here are still friendly but more reserved as the North is made up of many different ethnic minority hillside tribes, so it is back to the staring routine for the most part. I suppose this is how Mick Jagger feels as my glory days seem to now be behind me. I am not washed up though, at some point I go through a random village and 2 kids hold out there hands as I pass on the bike, yelling hello. I reach out and give them high fives without slowing down, I told you it's the rock star life out here.

I originally went to Cam Thuy so that I could go play in Vietnamcoracles "Limestone Loop", a series of roads taking one around the mountainous limestone Karst region of the North West. Once I got there, I took a look at my remaining days on the visa, and reconsidered as time was getting tight. I realized I could be in Hanoi in a day, so headed there instead in order to head to the famous "Ha Giang" loop, continuing around to Sapa, and then cutting South back to the Limestone loop depending on how many days I had left, but ensuring I had enough time to see what I came for, the real North.

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Hanoi, Vietnam's capital and second largest city is a hectic one, but after Saigon Hanoi seems a bit tame. The traffic getting in was fairly easy thanks to the slow pace everyone drives, but it is still a bit of a free for all. I had no problem getting around, but did witness a scooter crash into a couple crossing the street, of course that scooter was driven not just by foreigners, but two women foreigners....need I say more. It looked like everyone was fine since it was a low speed crash so I did the Asian thing and pretended I saw nothing, and continued on.

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I was only staying the 1 night due to timing, so I grabbed a hostel and walked around the area a bit, hit up a burger joint as I knew the food would be going downhill as I headed north, then I grabbed a waffle served with ice cream which surprisingly was a disappointment. From there I did some bar hopping starting on the famous "Beer corner", famous for cheap local beers which of course they were out of, so I was forced to buy slightly more expensive cheap beers. Eventually I ended up at another club, were I was forced to buy 5 dollar Budweisers....wtf you must be kidding me? Needless to say Hanoi was fine, but nothing special after traveling the length of Vietnam. I could have used a few more days to get a feel for the city, but also don't feel like I missed out on much. From Hanoi most go on a tour of the famous "Halong Bay", which I also decided to skip. Everyone told me it was great, I do not doubt this, but again due to timing I figured this was more of a couples thing anyway, so jumped on the bike and pointed it North.

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I decided to go up to the edge of the border with China, to check out the Ban Gioc Waterfall. I was not sure how long it would take to get there, so was roughly shooting for Cao Bang for a stop over. Headed North out of Hanoi a few hours outside the city up until Thai Ngyun is awful, the road is fine, and traffic moves but is busy, and it is nonstop commercial store after commercial store. There is no distinction from 1 town to the next, it just feels like 1 long city.

My bike feels loose, I have taken a look at the front end multiple times since it started a bit after the guy in Hoi An replaced the front shocks for me, but everything seems fine up there. I stop at a random mechanic and ask him to tighten my chain since that was overdue anyway, and he shows me it is the rear bearings causing the rear wheel to wobble. Remember the kind old man in Hue who tried to warn me, yeah thanks guy at the hostel for blowing it off as a scam. He takes off the rear wheel and the bearings pretty much disintegrate before our eyes. Now I am glad I stopped, he replaces them for 10 bucks and adjusts the chain since the wheel was off now the bike is back to normal. I feel great now so stop for some delicious Pho and a coke, and am only charged 1.08 USD which is the lowest I have paid yet considering a coke alone usually costs me 65 cents. Things are going well now.

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I continue on another hour or so before my chain jumps off the sprocket. God damn, that idiot didn't adjust the wheel properly. This caused the chain to kink a bit, but I am able to put it back on the sprocket by hand and rotating the chain fixes the kink....but when it jumped it damaged the adjustment pieces on the bike, something I will need to replace later. I limp on until I find another mechanic who bends the piece back to normal and makes a quick adjust to the chain for me, then he sees the axle nut is loose. That idiot mechanic didn't tighten it properly, which is what caused the chain problems. The good mechanic charges me nothing and sends me on my way. Another hour or so of taking it easy as I am now outside the city, and the chain jumps again....son of a bitch. I was passing a little girl on a bicycle when it broke, so I coast down the hill so as not to break down right in front of her looking like a jackass foreigner on a crappy Chinese bike. I come to a stop and jump off ready to put it back on the sprocket only to see it didn't just jump the sprocket, this time it broke right off. Not only that but it broke off up at the top of the hill where I passed the girl...of course it did. So not only is it physically impossible for me to go anywhere, I have to walk up the F'ing hill to retrieve the chain.

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With chain in hand I see a small village where I had broke down. I can tell just by looking that they won't have a mechanic, so need to decide if I should push the bike forward to where I have not yet been, or turn back and head for Thai Nguyen which was the last city I passed, and hope I will find a mechanic prior to the actual city as it is 17 KM back. Just then I hear a scooter coming from the small village. I motion to him to stop so I can show him the broken chain and play charades to confirm that they do not have a mechanic in his village. I indicate forward, and then back, to which he tells me go back...I can only hope that he doesn't mean all the way to Thai Nguyen. At least I know which direction to head now. Luckily the weather is great, the sky is blue, and I am in a hilly rather than mountainous area, so tell myself it could be worse. I push to the edge of the hills and jump on, coasting down the hills with a big smile on my face enjoying the peacefulness as it is crazy quite here, then the fun ends and I am forced to push up the next hill, luckily I am getting good at these walks of shame. People must have thought I was an idiot as I cruised by with a broken bike smiling, but I didn't care.

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I see a sign for various towns and am forced to make another decision, I can continue straight to Thai Nguyen which is the sure thing, or I can take a left/right which may or may not find me a mechanic, and may extend my walk if I need to turn around defeated and continue on to Thai Nguyen. Luckily I get to the actual intersection, and there is a restaurant so I can play some more charades. The old guys tell me to go right, the young guys tell me to go left, son of a bitch nothing is easy. I decide the young guys may have a lot less to hold a grudge on foreigners for in this country, so go left even though it says 10 KM. As I am pushing towards Thi Tran Du an old guy on a scooter stops, and points holding up 3 fingers. I assume this is 3KMs, so thank him and continue on. A few minutes later he returns, forcibly telling me no no no, turn around idiot, oh ok I guess I missed it. Turns out he must have meant 3 houses, as I passed a shop that had no one around, and looked more like a store than a shop.

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I find the mechanic with his wife and kids, and get him to replace my chain. Over the next few minutes the empty shop fills up with about 15 people, as word has spread the foreigner is here. I guess not much happens in this small place. Half of the crowd leaves once the story of me missing the shop is told 3 or 4 times and they see I am now fine. I get some tea and there is the usual small talk/charades.

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Eventually a really old guy walks slowly across the street, he says some things to me and gives me a very respectable handshake. I am pretty sure he put on his best shirt when he heard I was here. The aunt/friend asks if she can get a pic of me with the kid, but turns out the kid was racist and he started screaming the second he is put on my lap. All in all it was a great time and I am pretty sure I was the 1st foreigner they have ever had. Slightly defeated after several mishaps in 1 day, and thinking about how the North is known for it's cold wet weather, I decide heading North may not be the best plan with the expiring visa so backtrack to Thai Ngyuen for the night scratching plans for Cao Bang/Ban Gioc Waterfall and instead will return to Hanoi.

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Well this is a fucking adventure blog, so after a good nights rest I say to hell with canceling my plans and start back for Cao Bang, I won't be defeated that easily bitches. It's a cold wet day, and I hate retracing my steps, but as I pass my breakdown spot I feel rejuvenated as it's all new territory from here. The drive is nice enough, I pass through villages and rice fields, the scenery is now getting better. Later I pass through some random small town, and start climbing up a mountain. Suddenly out of nowhere, the crappy Chinese bike has no power, it slows to a stop and refuses to go up the mountain. I pull over, take a look at the obvious things, and honestly don't know what I should do. After a few minutes I start it up and it starts climbing again, but the temporary failure has me worried so I do a 360 and head into town. I pass a mechanic shop so stop to turn around, this time on level ground. I give it gas and this time the bike refuses to move, not even an inch. I look back and see some smoke coming from the rear wheel, great idiot mechanic with the bearings strikes again. I literally have to push it across the street up to the shop with the rear wheel sliding as it is locked up, so much for trying to not look desperate. They insist on replacing the hub for reasons I do not fully know, while replacing the bearings and getting me on my way. The do not charge me an insane amount so I am just relived to get out of there.

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I then head over the mountain, but with the previous incidents from the last 2 days my mind starts playing games on me and I am not convinced all problems have been resolved. I feel like it is missing power, so decide I can't get stuck up North and turn around to return to Thai Ngyuen rather than getting deeper in the mountains. Once over the mountain everything feels ok again now that I am on level ground so I rethink everything and decide to stop in Bac Kan, the nearest city back, to reevaluate as Thai Ngyuen is larger but had nothing going on so figure there is no reason for me to spend another night all the way back there.

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Well no surprise but Bac Kan doesn't have anything going on either, even for a decent sized city. I grab a hotel, take a look at the remaining days for my visa and a map to gauge how much time I need to get through the North. I decide to push onto Ban Gioc, I will see this damn waterfall if it kills me, if I have to ditch the bike I can always get a bus back to Hanoi and jump on a plane. I wake up the next morning and drive from Bac Kan to Ban Gioc through some rain, but this time without any additional issues.

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The drive out to Ban Gioc was decent, there is an alternate longer way that looks fantastic, but takes about 5 hours so I took the easy quicker way. Even the easy way was good, it is a nice road with gentle curves that let you go at a good pace, driving along some good scenery and more remote villages. The road takes you up to the Chinese border where the falls are. At certain times of year it looks amazing, but I knew going in that wouldn't be the case now. It is rain season, and was foggy and grey, but the benefit is the water is flowing. After I hit up the falls I grab a home stay in the area as it is late afternoon, and I am wet.

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The home stay was interesting, but I am generally not a fan. You stay over in someones house, often sleeping on a mattress on the floor, getting a glimpse into their life which I am fine with. The problem with this is they often speak little if any English, so it can get awkward. Luckily this one had 5 other travelers, so it was a great time, but I try and avoid these places as I worry it will be just myself and a family I cannot communicate with, fun for 20 minutes or so, then just weird. They cook us up a fantastic meal of local foods, and we share stories, rice wine, and some beers for the rest of the night.

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The next morning I head out passing through Cao Bang and continue to Beo Lac, that's right the Ha Giang loop is back on. The bike is back to normal, and the others at the home stay came from the North so I was given some great tips on where to go and told what I would miss if I turned back. It is a long day of riding, it is slow going due to conditions and curves, but the road takes me through some amazing places, this is some of Vietnams best. From here on out the riding is pretty phenomenal, the North is amazing. Beo Lac has a market as most of these places do, but all the restaurants are dead. I decide to hit up a restaurant anyway as I see nothing in the market and don't trust the street food I see. The guy shows me my choices, I point to Rice, Greens, and Nem, telling him no thanks to the meat options as the town had a good amount of signs advertising dogs. Unfortunately the food sucked, the rice and greens were ok but the nem was cold and had been sitting. I have had amazing nem, this wasn't one of those times.

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The riding continues to amaze me as I travel on wards. Today I am aiming for Dong Van as it is only 22 KM farther than Meo Vac, but up here everything takes longer so not sure how things will play out. I make good time to Meo Vac and arrive by noon, but just as I get there it starts to rain. I decide to grab a hostel since the ride between here and Dong Van is the legendary Ma Pi Leng Pass, rated as Vietnam's number 1 pass. I figure I will wait a day for better weather, as I am now ahead of schedule. There is some conflicting info online about the Ha Giang province permit and if it is needed, so I ask at the guesthouse and they say I do not need it. Since I have all afternoon I walk over to the police station and purchase it anyway, since it takes 5 minutes and is only 10USD. Worst case scenario I have a 10 dollar souvenir.

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At police station, enter this room on left for Ha Giang Permit

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The weather improves by next day, and the pass lives up to it's hype at almost 5,000 feet above sea level. As soon as you leave Meo Vac you start climbing the mountain, turn a few corners and are presented with the classic view with the river deep below. The road twists and turns along the mountain while passing through some more remote villages. I hit it on a Saturday so it feels very touristy as unlike my other rides, I am no longer the only one out stopping to take pictures. There are tons of bikers, word is out that this is the place to ride. I take lots of pics, the fact that we are all being tourists doesn't ruin the ride, but the pass is over quickly due to only being 22 KMs. Continuing on the ride is still amazing, and I spend the rest of the day twisting my way through mountains as I continue onto Ha Giang.

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Everywhere in the North is pretty dead. The riding is fantastic, but there is not much going on, and very few foreigners this time of year. Ha Giang is a large town, but the hostel I am in is empty, I am literally the only 1 there. I don't mind though, the days ride here was amazing, and ended with another pass I didn't even know I was going to go through. This one was all downhill, without too many switchbacks, which meant I could keep the speed up. I stopped to take a pic of the road and saw two foreigners rip by, so followed them at a distance which let me gauge the speed I could make turns and rip down that mountain following them. That was a great ending to a fantastic day. Since I did not stay in any hotels between Meo Vac and here, I was never asked about the permit, but I think had I stayed in some of the smaller towns I would possibly have needed it, so it ends up being a 10 dollar souvenir.

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From Ha Giang it was onto Sapa, and everyone knows Sapa sucks. Well, everyone but Vietnam, they have ruined it. But before I could make it to Sapa, a few hours outside Ha Giang I got a flat and had to do yet another walk of shame. Luckily this one happened only about a 1/4 mile from a shop, so I got the new tube replaced in no time and continued onto Sapa. I have been constantly warned I should stay outside Sapa in the surrounding area. The entire town is under construction, once they realized that tourists liked the tranquil town, the went into expansion overdrive with hotels, restaurants, and bars. It's lit up like Vegas, full of tourists, and yet there is no party/social scene...at least this time of year. The reason people go here was the tranquility which is long gone, along with the walking tours led by the local Hmong women who lead you to their local village to give you a taste of their life. That is fine and dandy, but I have driven through enough remote villages at this point to where walking in the cold rain doesn't sound appealing, as Sapa is so high up in the mountains that it is usually foggy, cold, and wet. I am only here for the nearby riding and the western food, but due to the food decide to stay right in town despite the warnings. I had thought about the burgers I would be eating for days, man was I disappointing as even the food sucks here. What a let down, Sapa is a bust.

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From Sapa I head South making my way back towards the limestone loop. I make a last minute change of course due to some tips by the San Fransisco couple at the Ban Gioc home stay, and cut in through Mu Cang Chai. This takes me on another fantastic road, and through a beautiful area full of rice terraces. Sadly, this is another area that is being ruined, and there is an enormous resort being built right on top of one of the most picturesque locations in this area, it is horrendous but I still enjoy the trip. I push onto Nghia Lo to make more ground, but this is a long day and probably could have stopped in Mu Cang Chai as there were some home stays in the area.

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The highlight of Nghia Lo is just some mystery meat pho, but it is delicious. A random dude joined my table so I showed him a map of my awesome adventure. He spoke a lot of Vietnamese hoping I may suddenly pick it up, and of course there was some awkward silence. But as I go to leave, he tells me he is buying my meal, suddenly Nghia Lo isn't so bad. I leave tentatively thinking I may have misunderstood, but the lady in charge indicates they have already discussed it. Sweet, this is my 3rd or 4th free meal, rock star!

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Nghia Lo to Mai Chau, and Mai Chau to the border of Na Meo are all kind of a blur. Mai Chau sets you up for the limestone loop, which I cut through a portion of. The town itself was nothing special, but for some reason, possibly its proximity to both Hanoi and the limestone loop, there is a larger tourist presence than I expected. Some signs are in English, and some of the hotels are stupid expensive compared to other areas of Vietnam. I found a guesthouse right on the strip for the normal rate of 10USD, but a majority were listed online at 50+, I have no idea why I feel like I must be missing something here, but it doesn't seem to special to me. The loop itself is great but doesn't compare to the last few days of riding. even had 2 spare days in case something went wrong which I could have used to ride more of the loop, but decide I have had enough and head for the border, where the ridding gets better.

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I think I took the back way into Na Meo as the road was small, rough, and awesome. Villagers seemed surprised to see me back there, I kept telling myself there must be another way in as there is only scooter traffic, no 4 wheeled vehicles at all. The scenery was once again amazing, I keep thinking about how this is a great way to finish off Vietnam. Of course I get to the end of my route and pull up to a nice newly paved road just outside Na Meo, yup...I definitely took the back way in, I love unplanned adventures.

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Na Meo is very small, but has both a hotel and a smaller guesthouse. The hotel is pretty crappy, but I stayed there anyway in order to cross the border into Laos early the next morning. There is also a gas station there now so you can fill up before crossing, which seems to be newish based on previous comments I have read about gas.

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Adventure road on the left, new road on the right

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Laos has never been all that high on my list of destinations, I know next to nothing about the country, or what I am in for...but they will let me take the crappy Chinese bike across the border, so I am in for yet another unplanned adventure.

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[Wiley]

Laos (Approx Nov 1st-15th 2018)

OK so Laos was a let down. Don't get me wrong, it's no Singapore...it had its moments, some beautiful scenery, and is a great country to relax in. Problem was, I wasn't looking to relax, but Laos would let me bring the bike in from Vietnam keeping the moto adventure alive, so I figured I should take a look.

Na Meo to Xam Neua: 87Km
Xam Neua to Muang Hiam: 152 Km
Muang Hiam to Nong Kiaw: 167Km
Nong Kiaw to Luang Prabang: 141Km
Luang Prabang to Kasi: 272Km
Kasi to Vang Vieng: 56Km
Vang Vieng to Vientiene: 157Km

Total Laos Travel: 1,032Km (641 Miles)

With no plan I woke up and grab 1 last bowl of mystery meat pho in Vietnam and an oil change, and then drive the .001 miles to the border. There was nothing nice about the hotel I stayed in, but it is at the border, making an early crossing ideal. I parked the bike at the gate/stop sign, but of course the booth is empty. I decide I better leave the bike there and walk across the large lot to the immigration building, where I take care of my exit stamp. The guy stamps my passport and shows me 50,000 dong (2.15 USD), indicating I need to pay for the stamp. Now I have read other crossings are not charging this, so this is probably a complete scam, but also read that this was the norm at this crossing so it was no surprise. I had already decided I do not want my passport to mysteriously disappear and hand him the 50K, hey I want another crack at the corrupt cop in Saigon, but a corrupt border official, yeah I will do what he says. He slips the cash into the drawer quickly enough to confirm my suspicions that this is in fact probably a scam and that he didn't want his buddies to see, which is odd cause they all do it here. I then get pointed into another room to take care of the bike. Here I fill out some paper work, and pay 8.60 USD (200,000 dong) for the immigration form, possibly another scam as other borders don't have this fee/form either, but I did need the form in Laos so maybe they are all in on it. They tell me I can now go get the bike but take my passport to hold, as if I am going to run into Vietnam all rogue or something, hey at least least they are letting me take the bike out of Vietnam.

I get the bike and drive over to Laos customs building, parking in front of the office. Here there is more paperwork, I have to pay 41USD in USD cash. 40 is for the Visa on Arrival, even though it is supposed to be 35 for 1 month, again I read bout this inflated price and was prepared. 1 dollar is for a tourist fee, which seems new, but they gave me a coupon so I guess Laos is going to step up it's tourist infrastructure, something which really lacks here so I am happy to pay the small fee. With my Laos Visa stamp I am told to walk to the next window where I show the bike importation form I got in Vietnam, pay 3USD for a stamp, and am told I can now go wild in Laos. For some reason they tell me I need to walk my bike from the parking spot past the building....I have no idea what that is about but do so as I have read this before. Once I feel I am far enough past he building I get on, start the bike, and ride into yet another new country.

This border has become popular with motorcyclists coming from Vietnam, but is not necessarily a heavily used crossing. Immediately as soon as I am in Laos the road condition deteriorates. It is bumpy, rough, and basically a dirt mess. There are landslides everywhere, and some construction, but since rain season is now over the road is dry and easy enough to take on. It takes me 3 hours to get to Xam Neua, but with rain it could easily have taken me all day, so plan on the worst just in case as the road really is in bad shape. Everything feels and looks like Northern Vietnam aside from the squiggly writing style they use with the Laos alphabet. Yeah, at least in Vietnam I could learn words for rice, soup, meat etc, but now I am flying blind...I am definitely going to be eating dog. It feels very rural here and they appear to rely more on the old school farming methods from back in the day. I go through small village after small village and the kids are still fantastic, enthusiastically yelling hello, only now the girls seem to be on the same level as the boys initiating the hellos, where in Vietnam the girls were more reserved, often waiting for a wave from me before smiling and returning one.

Xam Neua is a small city with a number of guesthouses. It gets it's share of tourists but is definitely off the tourist trail, actually known on tourists blogs for being off the trail if that makes any sense. Actually the ride in from Vietnam was off the trail, this place has a number of guesthouses, and at least 5-10 ATMs, this is not off the trail, but whatever. Luckily there are also 5+ moto shops, as I woke up the next morning to a flat, looks like that rough road took a toll on the bike. Now I will have to spend another night here, but the guesthouses which are basically hotels are slightly cheaper than Vietnam at 8 dollars a night, though food is slightly more expensive so it evens out, but it is all still Asia cheap so who's counting?

I get the tire fixed and hangout at the guesthouse for most of the afternoon. Eventually bored with sitting around I drive up to the local wat in the evening for a view of the town. The wat is nice enough, and a couple guys talk to me and ask for their fan pictures, something I have grown accustomed to. They take off and a little later a group from Vietnam show up and we have to do the same thing, sometimes the rock star life is hard. I eventually slip away back to the guesthouse for an early night, as the next day would be a long drive to Nong Khiaw.

Yeah right, that's what I think. I get downstairs at 6:30 to load the bike and no one is there to check me out. This doesn't matter though, as I see my rear tire is flat again, son of a bitch. This tells me that the problem is a spoke puncturing the tube, which also tells me I am not getting that early start I was hoping for. After a great breakfast of Pho I return to the shop to have them fix the problem. Back when the rear tire locked up in Vietnam and I had the hub replaced they had to put on new spokes etc. Well, they didn't do a good job with the tape inside the rim and this is why I am getting flats, bastards...if you want something done right do it yourself. The guys at the shop try selling me new rims for absolutely no reason, I finally convince them I just want tape and we eventually get things sorted out.

I considered staying another day in Xam Nuea due to the late start despite having had enough of this place, but prior to heading to the shop I google stopping points between my destinations and discover Muang Hiam is a 4-5 hour drive which is perfect so I decided to check out of the hotel. From the shop I take off and drive through scenery that is reminiscent of Vietnam, mountains, villages, and twisties. The weather is great but the going is slow due to the road conditions. A cop pulls me over most likely for speeding, but as soon as I jump off the bike and flip the lid up he waves me on...looks like foreigners get special treatment here as well. Later on I randomly stopped off a the Saleuy Waterfall since I could see it from the road, rain season has just ended but the water flow was good and only cost a buck so I figured it was worth the stop. I also climbed up the top and then grabbed lunch so was there about an hour lost there, but a nice break in the day. Later on I see two foreigners on the side of the road so I stop to chat, as I haven't seen any other foreigners in over a week. They are a couple of french guys headed in the opposite direction to Vietnam, so we have a quick conversation for 5-10 minutes about what we are both in for.

I eventually arrive in Muang Hiam just a bit before nightfall, I don't know what time I left the shop, and since Laos is just as beautiful as Vietnam I stopped a lot for pics, but I was kind of cutting it close with light. With a reasonable departure this place makes a good stopping point as there are not too many options out here and this town has several cheap guesthouses, the drive straight to Nong Khiaw would have been too much for me I think. I suspect the French guys were headed to Xam Neua, if so they didn't have a chance of making it before nightfall so hopefully they had other plans.

Nong Khiaw is when Laos really starts to feel touristy, there are English menus at the restaurants, and a number of guest houses available. It sits on a river, and is surrounded by limestone mountains, but the town itself is nothing special. I probably would not have enjoyed it if it were not for the lookout. As I sat eating lunch by the river I looked up to the top of a mountain and saw a shack, which appeared to be a lookout point. I google it and sure enough it is only an hour or so hike. I recommend you do this if in town, it was not a difficult hike, though not easy either. Even though I saw some tourists walking around town I was naive enough to think I would have the sunset to myself after not seeing any foreigners for almost 2 weeks prior to this, but it was myself and 20 or so other people at the top. That probably worked out better as it was more fun to hangout up there as we all waited for the sunset, which did not disappoint.

From here South I am now following the tourist trail. Next I hit up Luang Prabang, which was a happening city by Laos standards. This was the place to be for tourists, though I am not sure why. Designated A UNESCO site in an effort to preserve the Lao traditions while integrating a European style of architecture, the city is ok but nothing special. It is full of touristy restaurants and a couple of ok bars, along with numerous Buddhist temples. A google search shows that the UNESCO designation has pretty much led to its downfall, causing a rapid change over the last few years. I didn't love it, and while I made some friends the two nights I was there I was eager to move on. Of course, honorable mention to the after hours party at the bowling alley/archery range, cause who doesn't like drunken archery. The bowling didn't start off so hot, 1 of the guys girlfriends was even talking smack to me when she was beating me, not knowing that was just the fuel I needed to light the fire. Joke was on them as I came back to win it in the 10th frame. In your face...USA beats the brits again, I am surprised there wasn't a USA chant to be honest.

I got a text from friends I made the 1st night recommending the local waterfall, Su Kiang as we had previously discussed if it would be worth it. I was pretty hungover due to the friends I had made the second night, but forced myself to go due to the text as they went the day before. For 2.50USD the falls are well worth it as there are numerous falls and cascades which are a beautiful blue color. Even though the falls were on the way I would have skipped them as I didn't feel all that great, but they were the perfect hangover cure.

When I say on the way, I should clarify I barely looked at the map, and it was not even close to on the way. Laos roads are not the best, but not as awful as I had heard they would be, some of this is dependent on time of year. Looking at google maps I saw a fairly major road going South from the falls, but I did not really look at how I would need to back track almost all the way back to Luang Probang before turning South again for Vang Vieng. Turns out this was not much of a road at all, and while I could have used a nice paved road for my condition that day, I always love an unplanned adventure!

I leave the falls and jump onto a wide, well graded dirt road, it is in excellent condition so I can cruise along at a quick pace. I know there is a road somewhat in the vicinity that currently has a travel advisory, which is odd as the US usually just says to avoid entire countries, but I don't know where it is so push on in ignorance. I am pretty sure it is not here but further east, but have no idea as I don't really care, but you might want to look into that. This is not the adventure part though, as I continue on the road condition continually goes downhill. I am driving through amazing areas, small towns, and barely even see scooter traffic, but it is too good to stop and check my map or do any planning, what am I a nerd? The road follows the Mekong river but I only have views of it at times due to the lush vegetation everywhere, and that I am busy picking my line trying to avoid rocks. The advisory sticks in the back of my head since I am out in who knows where, but loving this trip even though I have no idea what I will do when the bike brakes down since it has been so long, and I know its overdue.

Eventually the state of the road gets to the point where I am climbing over small boulders with this crappy Chinese bike, maybe I will need to rename it as it is handling the terrain beautifully. After several hours of this I finally make it out to the main road, and have come to the realization that I need to back track considerably, and will not be making it to my destination. Turns out I took highway 1 from Luang Prabang to Muang Nan, which is a yellow road on google maps. I now see there is a small connecting road to Kasi that appears to be paved but have no real idea, I wish I had seen that connector and tried it....but there were some good twisties taking the long way to Kasi that I would have missed so who knows what would have been the best route. I backtracked and drive for another couple hours on fun mountains that the bike struggles to get up finally arriving in Kasi, which was nothing to write home about.

Well in hindsight, I should have just returned and stayed another day in Luang Prabang, or just repeatedly taken the adventure road going back and forth on it again and again, cause it was only downhill from here. Vang Vieng is famous for tubing on the river while bar hopping. I didn't particularly like the place, and I didn't go tubing on the river, though later was told it was a lot of fun. One girl even showed me a bruise on her leg the size of my head, ok I guess it isn't a lazy day floating downstream sipping beers that I pictured, maybe next time. I didn't really take any pictures here though.

Looking at some maps and realizing I was falling behind on my loose schedule for Asia, I started to think about skipping Cambodia. Then if I was going to skip Cambodia, I didn't want to drive down into southern Laos as Vientiane is located about halfway between the North and South, so going further would require me to retrace my steps to return to Vientiane and try to sell the bike.

Honestly, since I have already seen Angkor Wat, I will admit my sole reason for wanting to go to Cambodia with the bike are the corrupt border officials. It is completely legal to take a Vietnamese plated bike from Vietnam into Cambodia, but as there is only 1 land border crossing from Laos to Cambodia, the corrupt officials will let people enter the free zone and then deny the bike, forcing them to sell it cheaply or just ditch it all together. Well F them, I wasn't going to play that game. Turns out you can illegally smuggle bikes into Cambodia, yes more adventure! But I didn't do that ...and I certainly don't recommend you do it as you will be entering a country illegally. For those wondering, all you need to do is get down South to Don Det island, ask around and you can find someone who will take you and the bike, ILLEGALLY, into Cambodia via boat. You leave the bike on a farm and he brings you back to Laos to then cross the border and get your passport exit and entry stamps, the bike is no longer part of the equation. Then you just hitchhike back to your bike in Cambodia. As there is no corresponding paperwork for it in Cambodia, not going to lie, I wish I had done it, my resume could use "Illegal Moto Smuggler" to catch HRs eye in my future job searches.

Being the capital I expected too much from this place even after reading that nothing goes on here. I figured it was worth trying to sell the bike in order to help my decision making even though my mind was pretty much made up to ditch the bike. If I pushed on I would have done the Thacket loop, which I believe is a famous moto loop for people on scooters.....fun but nothing crazy. There is also an impressive waterfall or two in Southern Laos, and some relaxing islands, but really I was over Laos. My hostel, like all here, was pretty dead so I put a sign on my bike to see what would happen and waited. Demand in Laos for a Vietnamese plated bike is reportedly pretty high. I probably should have tried to sell it in Luang Prabang, but in the end I was still successful. I decided to part ways with the crappy Chinese bike. I sold it the 1st day, but the couple who bought it was the only 1 to inquire about it so I don't know if I was lucky or not, it is definitely low season here so other times of year may be completely different. We had some good times, and it took me to some amazing places, but I was happy to be free of it and rather than continue on with Laos jumped on a plane to Indonesia, a place I figured would be more my style due to the surf, beaches, mountains, ect.

When I sold the bike we discovered that the muffler bracket didn't survive the adventure road, it had broken and the muffler was being held up by the brake, so even though I was sure they could find a welder for cheap, took off another 15$ from the selling price, so sold it for 210USD, 10 more bucks than I paid. in I believe the demand is high and I probably could have sold it for 250USD, but was happy to get rid of it and move onto my next destination, Indonesia. That wasn't a moto adventure so this will be the end of my ride report, don't worry, I am still unemployed so will be headed South of the border in 2-4 weeks, so at a minimum Mexico, if not all the way to Argentina is next.

Not counting gas and oil changes, I put in an additional 125USD in parts as the crappy bike repeatedly broke down. I will count the 125 but 60USD of that was preventative as I thought I would have the moto longer (upgraded rear tire, sprocket, and front shocks, could have lived with what I had) so the cost could have been even lower, but these bikes are complete crap so you never know how it is going to go. I sold the bike for 225USD, but again dropped it lower due to the broken bracket, selling it for 210USD. I had the bike for just over 6 weeks, making my final total:

Purchase price: 200USD
Maintenance: 125USD
Selling Price: 210USD

Total Cost: 115USD or 2.50USD per day, not a bad adventure.

Thank you all for making me finish up this report, there was more interest than I anticipated, a good amount of thread views for a shorter trip, and I appreciate it! There is another forum I posted Vietnam/Laos on and have zero replies, so I really mean it. Plus, you provide me plenty of info with yours, so I hope I am providing enough info for someone's future trips.

The bike obviously changes the dynamic of the trip immensely, and I looking back I ended loving every minute of it, rain or shine, broken down, or eating foods I didn't necessarily enjoy at times, it was fantastic. This picture I found in the window of a shop in Laos sums it up perfectly I think.