Funny

[ccookie66]

[Munken]

Translated from Swedish.

A young guy from the north of Sweden moved to Stockholm and went to the big mall to look for a job. The head of mall wondering:
- Do you have any experience as a salesman?
- Yes, I have worked as a salesman at home in the forests.

The manager thought the guy seemed nice and forward so he decided to hire him.
- You can start tomorrow, 'he said to the guy. I'll come down after we're closed tomorrow night and see how you had it on your first day.

The guy had a heavy day, but finally it was over. And after closing time came, the manager came down as he promised.
- How many deals did you do today? asked the manager.
- One.
The manager become a little puzzled and said:
- Just one!? Our salesman would usually make between 20 and 30 deals in one day. How much money was the deal about?
- 911 138 SEK.
The manager was really surprised and said:
- 911 138 SEK! What did you sell to him?
- First, I sold a small fishhook.
- Then I sold a medium fishhook, he continued.
- Then I sold a large fishhook and then it became a fishing rod.
- When I asked where he was going fishing, he replied that he would go down to the coast.

- So I said that he would need a boat, so we went down to boat department.
- I sold him the big Baylinern with twin engine.
- Then, it turned out that his little Honda Civic did not pull the big boat, so I took him to the car department and sold him that 4-wheel drive Chevrolet Tahoe.

The manager, who was now in shock managed to recover slightly and said:
- So you mean to say that a guy came in to buy a fishhook and you managed to sell him a boat and a car?!?!?!
- No, no, the guy said. He came in and was going to buy tampons for his wife, so I told him that he might as well go fishing, because the weekend would be ruined anyway!

[ccookie66]

Thats hilarious!

[chevymaher]

politician.jpg (26.33 KiB) Viewed 2136 times

[chevymaher]

I like the sense of humor here.

[Munken]

A cell phone rings and one of the men in the locker room responds with hands-free and speaker.
Everyone else in the room listening as well ....

Man: HELLO!
Woman: Honey, it's me. Are you at the club?
Man: ..... Yes.
Woman: I'm in town and have found a fantastic leather jacket. It costs only $1500. Is it OK if I buy it?
Man: Well, then, of course, if you are so fond of it.

Woman: Now that I have you on the line to ... I was also just past the Mercedes dealer to get that star mounted you know. They've got a 2013 super cool SLS AMG. It's just one of those that I always wanted.
Man: What is it?
Woman: $210000. in the standard version.
Man: OK, so buy it then, but for that price, it should also have winter wheels!

Woman: Thank you, darling what you're cute. So it was just one more thing. The summer house that we looked at last year, is for sale again. For $1575000.
Man: OK, bid only 1.5 million. If thay accepts it, it's okey and if they don't take it, give them that 75000 to. It's a good price though.
Woman: OK. See you later. I love you, sweetie!
Man, Goodbye - I love you too.

The phone call ends and the other men in the locker room staring at him - speechless - until the man with a big smile says:

Is there anyone here who know whose phone this is?

[ccookie66]

Thats funny!

[Munken]

BENEFITS To BE 50 +

1) Kidnappers are not very interested in you.
2) In a hostage situation you are likely one of the first to be released.
3) No one expects you to run - anywhere, at all.
4) When people call kl.09 in the morning, there is no risk that they will wake you up.
5) People no longer look at you as a hypochondriac.
6) You have no more to learn the hard way.
7) One of the things you buy now, keeps the rest of your life.
8) You can live without sex but not without your glasses.
9) You no longer see a speed limit as a limitation.
10) You've stopped keeping your stomach in, no matter who is passing by.
11) Your secrets that you share with friends, stay with them. Because they can not remember them.
12) The number of new brain cells you have, is finally down to a level you can handle.

[Munken]

Chevrolet bigblock

[backinabox]

A young couple goes to visit the girls Grandmother for the first time.
The visit has gone on for close to an hour, the boyfriend is bored so he starts to munch on peanuts placed in a bowl on the coffee table
The visit finally ends and they are saying they're goodbyes
The Boyfriend says " It was very nice to meet you Mam, sorry if I ate all your peanuts"
The Grandmother says " OH that's OK young man since I got dentures all I can do is suck the chocolate off of them"

[The Drummer]

Did you know that they have just found a microship in trumps head? ,doctors said not to worry tho because its in the part of the head he never uses , its in his brain the doc said .

[AstroWill]

LOL, indeed.

A young couple goes to visit the girls Grandmother for the first time.
The visit has gone on for close to an hour, the boyfriend is bored so he starts to munch on peanuts placed in a bowl on the coffee table
The visit finally ends and they are saying they're goodbyes
The Boyfriend says " It was very nice to meet you Mam, sorry if I ate all your peanuts"
The Grandmother says " OH that's OK young man since I got dentures all I can do is suck the chocolate off of them"

Eww, I didn't see that one coming.